You know, after watching a 2 and a half hour video of DarkSydePhil painfully fumble his way through Metal Gear Solid 3, I realized something. This is exactly how Bores would do a blind Let’s Play. He’d blame the game for his own faults, he’d crack jokes non-stop, and he would act like a child. Good thing Bores hasn’t discovered Let’s Plays, otherwise we’d get a crap-ton of Minecraft videos, or whatever the big popular game is right now.
Anywho, new video. His first Neo video since January. Injustice: Gods Among Us. Huh, funny how we all predicted he’d do this one. I thought it wouldn’t be for another few months considering how long he takes. But he managed to get it out within a fortnight of release. Let’s see how much of the game he actually played.
0:06 - 0:15: IG begins the video claiming he got a lot of requests to review it. Uh huh, yeah I’m sure. It’s not like you’re predictable considering how often you gush about Mortal Kombat and that you’re a self-proclaimed DC fanboy, and this a DC fighting game from Netherrealm Studios, the people behind the latest MK. No no, it was the fans.
He holds up the box, then throws it. DON’T DO THAT! Stop treating your games like props! You never show respect to your games!
0:16 - 0:41: He starts up saying this new “brawling” game is from the creators of the MK reboot. Care to say the studio’s name?
He brings up that it has all our DC Comics characters, and some “not-so-favorites”. He has Raven on screen when he mentions this. What’s wrong with Raven? Do you not like the Teen Titans? Because I know a few people that will kick your ass with words.
Then he goes to characters that he doesn’t recognize. So you’re a “big comic book fan” and you claim there’s characters you can’t recognize. I’m looking at the roster and there’s no obscure characters. I don’t see crap like Brother Power of the Geek, Captain Carrot, or the rapist version of Doctor Light.
The footage is on Killer Frost, then it cuts to IG wondering who that is. Then… *sighs* Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons appears and tells him she’s a Firestorm villain. Ugh, was that needed? Yes yes, comic books but if Chris is claiming to be a big comic book fan going by his movie lists, then he should try to act the part. Not do a stupid bit with a Simpsons character.
By the way, I love how one of the only comments (GotGame) calls it a “Matt Groening cameo”. That’s funny, I always thought CBG was played by Hank Azaria.
0:42 - 1:33: Characters are awesome, they come out swinging, they do cool things…
“Once a character hits their limit break” Again Chris, this isn’t Final Fantasy. It’s called a special, or a super move. Not a “limit break”. Learn your fucking terminology.
He mentions that some specials like Harley Quinn’s (you’re saying it wrong) aren’t that cool, and that some specials like The Flash’s make you wonder why the others aren’t this cool. Because Harley doesn’t have any superpowers, and the Flash is the fastest man alive. She’s kind of limited to what she can do, she’s not going to reenact the finale to the JLU episode “Divided We Fall” and run around the world to deliver a megaton punch.
After showing The Flash doing that, IG yells “Shazam” and gets hit by lightning. As if he wasn’t enough of a Mary Sue, he now has the powers of Shazam, that’s great. Oh wait, it was a joke because he didn’t get up. ………….
“Who know Aquaman was so powerful?” Anyone that read the comics? He rules the oceans, commands every fish in the sea, including sharks! He has super strength and durability. This perception of Aquaman being crap is only enforced by shitty comedy writers (E.G. Family Guy and Robot Chicken).
1:34 - 2:20: IG moves on to the story. He found it enjoyable and he managed to power through within two days. Wait, he actually beat it?
He claims that’s “rare” because he likes to … play a little at a time and… savor it like a … fine…wine. BULL! SHIT! Savor like a fine wine, give me a damn break. There’s so many games you’ve played for IG Neo that you only played for one or two hours, and then decide” Yup, that’s good enough”. That’s not “savoring”, that’s being lazy! That almost sounded like a response to the critics calling him out for not beating every game he reviews. Hey moron, ever consider that you’re exempt from not beating shitty NES games because of bad design? You don’t have that luxury with modern games, even if the controls are busted you have endless checkpoints and places to save, games these days love to hold your damn hand.
See, this is why Bores will never do things like Let’s Plays or livestreams, he’s laaaazy! That and a livestream chat would be trolled soooo hard.
Oh wait, this was all setting up a joke. Of course it was… IG is in a suit, holding a glass of wine and some flower saying that they’re “very cultured”, and then he drops his flower and yells “shit!” Hypocritical humor, because he just said he was cultured…
He summarizes the story and that DC fans will love this game (as it cuts to IG reading a Green Lantern TPB and wearing a Batman shirt shouting “Wooo”) and… Marvel fans will be jealous that they don’t have this “epic game” (cutting to IG reading an X-Men TPB and looking angry). Why did you bring up the Marvel fans? There was no reason to bring up the Marvel fans.
I love how he isn’t even wearing a Marvel related t-shirt. Couldn’t fully to the bit, now that’s sad.
2:21 - 2:50: He mentions Easter Eggs, like Hal Jordan being a Yellow Lantern (not an Easter Egg, it’s plot related) and then mentions they got Kevin Conroy to voice Batman (this surprises you?) and George Newbern as Superman from the “iconic cartoon series”. Actually, Newbern was Superman in Justice League and JLU. Tim Daly was Superman in The Animated Series. But that little research probably took away from your busy job of………….
2:51 - 3:34: IG then moves onto the negatives. And he says he can’t find any. Figures… because actually being critical is for neeeeerds.
Oh but he has stupid nitpicks. He found Wonder Woman’s breasts distracting since they were trying to go for “realism”. At least Power Girl isn’t the game… and you played MK9 you should have expected buxom women.
He also didn’t like that all you get for beating story mode is a new costume for Superman. What were you expecting? It’s a fighting game, the rewards aren’t going to be that amazing. It’s not like an RPG with New Game Plus that allows you to take all your stats into a new game and allow you to punish everything that gave you trouble at the start.
Oh and another lame Comic Book Guy bit. Whatever…
He mentions that the game will have DLC so if you’re hoping for Booster Gold or Blue Beetle, you might get it. Then it cuts to IG dressed as the leader of the Booster Gold fan club, he’s wearing a wig and an Injustice shirt. Why not a Booster Gold shirt? Then it transitions to IG saying “God help us all” and putting his hand on his face. What’s that expression meant to be? He’s such a bad actor it’s hard to tell.
There’s a 1% chance he’s right though, the only DLC character we know of is Lobo. But we’ll see what happens.
The video ends with his usual final verdict. He liked it. … Weak. At least there was no lame joke.
This review was… eeeeeeeeeeeeh. Certainly not the worst, but by no means good. As usual, no mention of online or even the controls for that matter. Just the story mode and some other things that really don’t matter in the overall scheme of things. Plus the lame lame Comic Book Guy bits. At least the Fall of Cybertron review had a character from Transformers, even though he’s just leftover from a pointless bit in his regular show. Why was he there? Because comic books? That’s a flimsy excuse.
I’ll give him credit for not mentioning he played this at E3. I guess he does listen, despite his mother’s abrasive insults.
I'll also give him credit for not wondering where the fatalities are. Anyone that asked that was stupid, and I'm not just talking about Bores.
Speaking of E3, I’m looking at the stuff he covered last year. I’m surprised he didn’t review God of War Ascension, unless he’s going to be late to that one. Star Trek just came out to pretty negative reviews. But I get the feeling he’ll give it a positive one because “Star Trek” and “gwaphics” (even though the game doesn’t really look that good).
This year’s E3? June 11th-13th. So the 3-4 weeks following that will be all boring E3 videos of info we could have gotten in five minutes through a Google search.