Turns out I was wrong in my last post, his new website is already here.
Now powered by Wordpress, the new IG site is Chris' latest attempt to look legit. He still fails.
The first big new thing is... news. He now reports news stories. Look out Kotaku, you have competition!
As of this posting, the latest story is about Conan O'Brien at E3 and how he missed seeing him. Shit, that Kotaku comparison was apt. This is old news.
But there's more, turns out he missed seeing Trey Parker and Matt Stone as well (he actually got their names right). I see he's making this all about him, calling himself the "king of missed guests". Nobody cares about the guests!
He did mention he saw JJ Abrams and he smacked him for blowing up Planet Vulcan in Star Trek 09. I'm sure there's some Frenchmen that would love to smack you for blowing up a certain office building. No I'm not letting that go.
Scrolling down, other news stories include a picture of a Portal cake *sighs* Seriously? Did you just discover Portal and not realize those jokes are waaaaaay past expiration date?
There's also Skylanders stories. No surprise there.
The "News" drop-down menu at the top of the page has four categories. "Video Game", "Show News" (which has nothing) "Skylanders" (ENOUGH!) and "Random Pop Culture". The last one only has links to the two IG Shorts he made. Wouldn't that be under Show News? Can't even get categories right...
The next drop-down menu is Game Reviews, listing his three video game related shows.
*clicks IG Neo* Oh, of course he doesn't list every single review. That would require effort. I don't see Sonic Generations, or the 3-in-1, or Video Game Roundup.
Also, couldn't he have picked better images? The one for Arkham City makes him look psychotic.
*clicks regular IG show* Wait a second, Season 5?! So you're telling me the last three episodes were part of a new season? Thanks for informing us asshole! You clearly have no idea what you're doing, do you?
The other... seasons are listed on separate pages with links to each episode. Turns out Season 4 is only 6 episodes, taking tips from the BBC. Also, if that was meant to be his "movie", it would have a single digit score on Rotten Tomatoes. Such a convoluted and poorly paced mess.
"Year of the Story Arc!" I think you need to check your dates. The 7-Up video came out in 2010, and the X-Men video came out in 2012 (both in October). That's a bit more than a year. Then again, this inability to grasp the concept of time would explain the long delays,.
Next on the top menu is "Game Releases", which contains a list of upcoming video game releases. Why? You're probably not going to review 90% of these games, so why .list this? You're not GameSpot or GiantBomb (R.I.P. Ryan Davis).
It's also missing a lot of titles. I don't see Shin Megami Tensei IV, Tales of Xillia, The Wonderful 101, Monolith Soft's X, Bayonetta 2, and probably some others. What's that? Those are niche titles that only a select few would care for? It's my blog, I can complain about what I want.
To be fair, he does encourage people to e-mail him titles he missed. But, I don't think he's even heard of most of these games. The Witcher III, Total War: Rome II, The Bureau: XCOM Declassified ... he even gets titles wrong. Calling Infamous Second Son "Infamous 2 Second Son". Hey moron, we already have an Infamous 2, it's called Infamous 2.
Hold on, what's that say under August? "The Irate Gamer Game". You seriously think it's coming out next month? HAHAHA, you're a fool Chris if you ever think that game is coming. You got scammed.
The next few menus are the Gallery, with links to his "posters" and fan art. Either he hasn't uploaded them or his site is shit and I can't see them.
Followed by "Submit a Tip" and "Store". How long until you think the Submit a Tip page will go down thanks to trolls?
What's this? He has a comment box now? Hahahahahahaha AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAAHAHA! Oh wait, he could just moderate them. Oh well.
And that's his new site. You still fail Chris. You will never convince people you're a gamer.
EXTRA NOTE: I am aware that this site will likely get updated as time goes on. For those reading this in the future, this was what I saw the first time I saw the redesign.