Sunday, August 25, 2013

The Irate Gamer Game is Now Available. Abandon All Hope Ye Who Download

Welp, it finally happened, after years of jokes and ridicule, the fabled Irate Gamer Game is here.

Available only on iOS platforms, the full game will cost you $4 dollars (or 2.49 pounds over in the UK) but there is a Lite version for free. Basically, it's more expensive than acclaimed games like Angry Birds, Fruit Ninja, Plants vs. Zombies, World of Goo, and many more. GTA: Chinatown Wars costs the same on iOS, but that's a vastly bigger game, is a port of a game that was on DS and PSP.
Not to mention all the free games available with more content like Simpsons Tapped Out and Tetris Blitz.

https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/tigg/id688523904?mt=8

First big problem is the name on iTunes. It's not called "The Irate Gamer Game", it's called "TIGG". Nobody knows what that means, and people browsing the App Store are just going to pass by it without a second glance.

I'll bring up one of the game's only positives. The artwork in the comic book style cutscenes is actually pretty good. Whoever did it, your talent is wasted and you can do better things than this.

Seems the first review on iTunes came from Chris himself, who claims he's a big fan of Irate Gamer and Chris Bores (You know how producers say they are their own biggest critic? Chris is the opposite, he's his own biggest fan). He also mentions that it includes "artwork from the show". Does Chris not watch his own show? This artwork has never shown up anywhere.
In case the review gets deleted, Shaolin Dave has provided a screencap of it.


But how does the game play? Well, Guru Larry has checked out the Lite version and has provided me with his impressions of it. His comments are in blue (with some paraphrasing to fix some things up).

"It's unintuitive. There's a pit in the first level you assume you have to jump as there's nothing telling you otherwise. But no, you need to walk off the edge, which activates a hang glider mode where he just floats across. The game said nothing about this and I discovered it by accident. Why can't you just hold down the jump button to get across?"

"Also, the hang glider backfires as it activates every time you jump down a platform or fall to your death"

"You can't jump and shoot at the same time." To me, this sounds like one of the game's biggest sins. How do you make a 2D platformer where you can't jump & shoot at the same time?

"The only enemies in the game are those HAL things and land mines"

"It's way too generous with health refills (or Kool Aid jugs). Some appear literally every time you encounter an enemy."

"There's ladders and ropes in the game, but you can't use them as there's no Up or Down buttons, they're just decoration."

"There are no checkpoints. You need to finish an entire level in one go, made worse as everything bar the land mines and HAL robots kill you in one hit"

"There's invisible walls in the floating platform segments"

"And the boss of the first world is TWELVE HAL robots, there's no other enemies in the game from the show."

Wow, the game sounds like a hot mess. This does not surprise me.
Just like I predicted, this will get lost in the deluge of shitty iOS games. A $4 dollar price tag for something that looks like it should be free with dreadful controls and lack of variety. What a joke.

If anyone is brave enough to download, post your impressions in the comments. If you're capable of making a video review, that would be even better.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go play a real game with controls that work and gameplay that's fun *boots up Pikmin 3*

93 comments:

  1. The Citizen Kane of Video Games

    by Grounderr
    The IRATE Gamer Game is a groundbreaking masterpiece. Possibly the biggest gaming landmark since Super Mario Bros. in 1985.

    -Why?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Possibly the biggest gaming landmark since Super Mario Bros. in 1985."

      Aww, isn't that cute? This guy thinks the Irate Gamer Game (TIGG) can match up to Super Mario Bros. Also this guy seems to be forgetting about other [true] "gaming landmarks", like Tetris and Ocarina of Time.

      Delete
    2. Oh also I'm not referring to you, AnotherPersonGuyThing. I am referring to Grounderr (just in case you get confused).

      Delete
    3. What a crock of crap.
      I really miss "World of Goo".

      Delete
    4. Hey guys, you need to check your Sarcasm Detector, it's really failing.

      Delete
    5. @Franco

      Unfortunately, having seen first hand what some of the Irate Gamer fans actually do think and say on a daily basis, I wouldn't be surprised if the review wasn't sarcastic.

      Delete
    6. Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if the fandumb accuses AVGN of plagiarising TIGG for making the AVGN Adventures.

      Delete
    7. Even though AVGN has nothing to do with developing it. Then again, he got flamed for the Cheetamen 2 Kickstarter which he had no involvement in other than making a cameo appearance in a commercial because his friend asked him to, and for an early budget estimate on his film's IMDB page that he didn't even know existed.

      Delete
    8. He's comparing his game to Citizen Kane? *laughs out loud*

      He should be comparing it to Gigli, the Room, or any Ed Wood movie! XD

      Delete
  2. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The reason I deleted my comment was I had a typo. So now it's fixed. it's the comment that is below this comment.

      Delete
  3. Didn't Chris say in his Silver Surfer review that he hates games that have no checkpoints, save features, and die in one hit?

    Why praise a game of his own that has this problem?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Because of IG's egotism and superhuman hypocrisy.

      Delete
    2. MadMediaLabs may have created the game to mock the Irate Gamer and his biggest fears in gaming.

      I'd liked it better if the game pulled a Braid and suddenly Evil Gamer becomes good as the game progresses, while Bores begins to go mad with power slaughtering his own allies and by the end of it all, Evil Gamer is the player's character instead of IG.

      Delete
  4. In other words, we have "The Suckass Poorman's Version" of Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My only guess is that he demanded the game be rushed out so he could claim the AVGN game ripped him off, having been released later (even though the first AVGN game, endorsed by and even featuring voice acting and original footage from James, came out in February of 2008)

      Delete
    2. Well that and since the two games will two different genres means that neither will be ripping off the other. Also even if they were the same game the more polished one will be accepted while to crap one will be consigned to the void of obscurity rip-off or not.

      Delete
    3. Bores claims that James stole the idea to make an AVGN movie from IG season 4. I doubt any amount of logic will stop him from accusing James of stealing the game idea also, or his fans from believing it.

      http://irategamersucks.blogspot.com/2013/07/time-doesnt-move-normally-in-igs-bubble.html

      Delete
  5. Wow, for someone who likes mega man like bore claims, I figured he'd be pissed you can't jump and shoot. I mean, if a platformers controls aren't as solid as mega man, you got problems. You can also climb ladders in a mega man game...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm going to bet that he's going to review his game in 2 minutes and say that "it's a masterpiece" but only show him shooting the HAL bots and not go over the faults of the game as to duped his fans into believing that it's a good game.

      Delete
  6. The price on iTunes has dropped to $2.99.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Even if it dropped to only a penny, I wouldn't buy it.

      Delete
    2. It was a news flash, certainly not a recommendation.

      (A penny? I might check it out just to review it.)

      Delete
    3. Hasn't dropped to a penny yet. Meant to say "would drop."

      Delete
  7. I don't really want to bash Chris as a person, I honestly do like him as a person. And yes, I prefer him to the AVGN and that gap is widening the more I see of James' current output and position.

    But for a person who show entails harsh criticism of other developers works (for usually insignificant reasons), when it came to developing his own game, he shouldn't make the exact same flaws he's attacked others about. (people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones Etc.).

    But the game is of a quality (and feel) that of a free PD game you'd get on the cover disk of an Amiga magazine 20 years ago. Hell I'll prove it, Quik and Silva...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wSKWJgmb88

    Free on the cover of Amiga Format, March 1991. Also awesome soundtrack. (Fun fact: the first time Sonic ever appeared in a video game (albeit unofficially)).

    Dan also didn't mention I though the music in the game sounds like a Crack window when you download a pirated PC program. (A "Cracktro" as they're officially called)

    If anyone says if I'm being hypocritical, well yes I'm working on an iOS game with Ashens ATM based on that City Fighter popstation game (sort of a Super Hyper Fighting edition) but the game is purposely meant to be shit and will also be available for free.

    I do give credit for Chris for making this game, my hat goes off to him. but for its quality and his position/demeanor, he should have sold it for $1 or even for free with a bunch of ads on it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, The game has fallen to £1.99 in the UK now.

      It really should be the 69p price IMO ($1 US)

      Delete
    2. Oh, one more thing I forgot to mention that bugged me.

      On section 9 of the first world (right near the end), there a bit where you need to push a huge block to the other end of the platform in order to jump up and get across.

      problem is, rather than make one giant block sprite, they stuck two small ones on top of each other and thanks to the weird "slidey" inertia physics on pushing blocks, if you accidentally knock down the top one. you can't reach the platform, so you're essentially stuck there forever and have to restart the entire level.

      Delete
    3. I feel inclined to ask... how long was this game in development again?

      Delete
    4. I think it was in development since 2011, but I could be wrong.

      Can't wait to see TIGG lose to AVGN Adventures! (Not trying to be a fanboy, just from the negative reviews of Bores' game-- big surprise.)

      Delete
    5. @Andrew Schroy

      It's not even a matter of being a fan of either of the two. If someone were to claim that TIGG is the better of the two games, they're an idiot in denial. I would hope that even the most blindingly loyal of Irate Gamer's fanbase can look paste their bias and acknowledge that AVGN Adventures far more competently made.

      Remember Ecks vs Sever? That utter shitstorm of an action movie? It turned out a damn good FPS for the GBA. I don't HAVE to like movie to acknowledge that the game made from it was good.

      Delete
    6. Indeed if the movie sucks, the game strangely turns out to be great! Look at The Chronicals of Riddick, Dick Tracy on the mega drive/genesis, Prince of Persia, Sweet Home, Robocop 3 on the Amiga/Atari ST And Ecks Vs Sever.

      Delete
    7. There's also a good Flash game of The Room on Newgrounds.

      Delete
  8. If I were a fan of the Irate Gamer, seeing him 5-star his own game under the guise of a fan would turn me away like a spurned lover.

    That said, do we really know it's him? It could be a troll posting under his name to make him look bad (maybe iTunes doesn't work like that, I don't use Apple stuff so I wouldn't know). Kind of like when someone showed up on 4chan pretending to be Phil Fish pretending to be a Fez fan.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Chris did the same thing for his own DVD on amazon. Seriously if someone were trying to impersonate him, why stop at writing a fake review?

      Delete
    2. Do you think he'll ever realize that his real name shows up on that stuff?

      Delete
    3. Do you think he's realized yet that his show's story sucks, his main character is an utter sue and it was a major mistake giving the main character his name?

      If there's anything we've repeatedly seen from Chris, its not a well thought out plan.

      Delete
  9. I tried the lite version just now, and Jesus fucking Christ it's even worse than what Guru Larry said.

    There are NO GRAPHICS in the game, or at least when I played it. What I assume are supposed to be grassy areas or whatever in the first area (Green Lands) is instead replaced by white blocks. So because everything is a white box, I can't tell what anything is. The game says it needs iOS 6.0 or later and works on newer devices. I have version 6.1 and an iPhone 4. Apparently these dipshits only accounted for the iPhone 5. I have never heard of a game working only on iPhone 5 and not iPhone 4. Please tell me this is not a common thing with iOS games.

    There's also a glitch in the controls where sometimes tapping right or left on the D-Pad causes you to auto-run as if the game thinks you are holding on the D-Pad.

    I also believe the music may be stolen from other works. Level 3's stage music is exactly the same song used in a game called Infectonator. Unless the music is public domain or made by the same person (even though Infectonator is from a different company), this is plagiarism.

    The comic cutscene is really the only nice thing about this game.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Update on the music thing: It wasn't stolen. It's a public domain song apparently used by multiple apps.

      Delete
  10. Okay, so you downloaded and played the lite version, so did Larry, I think a couple others mentioned it as well. Why aren't there any reviews in the app store? That's where you guys should be mentioning all this.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I reviewed the "Lite" version, Apple only allows you to review the full version if you've bought it.

      But it appears reviews are only region specific, I can't see US reviews and vice versa.

      Delete
    2. Ah okay. Well, I see one US customer reviewed it.
      In addition to everyone who bothers downloading the game giving it honest reviews, everyone (wether they download it or not) should mark them as "helpful" or not (depending on if it's an honest review or just a sockpuppet)

      Delete
  11. Remember that Chris bashed Tekken 6 for its back box for having nothing but praise? Now he praised the game that based about Chris by himself. Congratulation, Chris! You've proven yourself that you're hypocrite again!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm going to riff Charlie. So what do you think?

    ReplyDelete
  13. Well, this is odd: theirategamer.com has posted its first item of the week, and it's about the monster cereals. Chris Bores is holding back on flogging his game. What could that mean?

    ReplyDelete
  14. You don't even fight the Predator in this?

    ReplyDelete
  15. I guess we shouldn't be too surprised that there's only two enemy types (if you can even call a landmine an enemy) considering how much Bores seems to hate variety.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The irony is that in his last review (Mighty Morphin Power Rangers), he complained there's not enough variety.

      You can't please him no matter what.

      Delete
  16. So I just downloaded the Lite version and played the first 2 levels. Controls are extremely stiff. I'm not sure if I'm doing it wrong, but I can't seem to duck either. In the first level, there was a part I thought I was stuck on, as it looked like I was caged in, and the character doesn't jump that high. Turns out the "wall" on the other end is in the background. Way to confuse people. I also have no idea how to reach the coins in that same area, you can't run and junp, and there's no platform to push or move to give you height.

    Second level had a similar scenario. There were coins within the aupposed solid wall. But if that's the case, how the hell are you suppose to know which walls you can climb and which you can walk through?. Also, still a bunch of unreachable coins.

    Can't figure out if coins and NES game carts do anything, though.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You definitely can't duck. The D-pad is 2-directional. Nifty design, huh?

      Delete
  17. Totally radical design.


    So Batdan or anyone else, what exactly is different from Lite vs. Paid? More levels?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I believe that's the difference. The Lite version features "world" or whatever #1. Paid gets you the rest.

      Delete
  18. If it weren't for those comic book like cutscenes I could have sworn I was playing an Action 52 game.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Did anyone else notice when it advertises you to buy the full version, the word Enemies is misspelled?

    Did Bores do the marketing for the game too? I find it hard to believe something as simple as that wouldn't be corrected by a "real" company.

    Out of curiosity, I did check out MadMediaLabs...from my quick browsing it doesn't even look like they make games. Maybe they did just slap it together to appease Bores and knew this shit would be garbage from the beginning.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Update from my Facebook informant.

    A fan noted the game is out and he can't wait to buy the full version (probably one of the few).
    Bores responds saying that he hasn't announced the game because they're still "fixing bugs".
    1. They released the game unfinished? What the hell?
    2. Trust me, bug fixes wouldn't be enough to save this crap.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He probably pressured the guys who made it to release before AVGN Adventures came out. It wouldn't surprise me.

      Delete
    2. This sounds like his 1st DVD all over again...

      Delete
  21. The entire game is a bug. You can't even duck! I wouldn't have any real qualms about that BUT if you style your controls like an NES controller with all 4 directions, I'm going to expect to be able to utilize all 4 directions (8 really, but I'm being nice). Let's not get started on the misleading background/foreground.

    ReplyDelete
  22. You know, I wonder-- could there be someone brave enough to buy both AVGN Adventures AND TIGG and give reviews on them? Like when AGentertainment bought and reviewed both AVGN and Bores' first DVDs back in December of 2007...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was only brave enough to get the lite version (only so I could get a laugh out of Bores' attempt at a game), but I AM planning on getting AVGN Adventures at some point, so I might try doing an AGentertainment-esque comparison between the two.

      Delete
    2. You still won't need the full version. Bores himself plays maybe 10-20 minutes of a game before delivering the final verdict. Why do more when it's his game on the line?

      Delete
  23. Anybody think Bores will report on the just announced 2DS?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm sure there'll be an exclusive sneak preview as soon as Target has them in stock and he can get a ride.

      Delete
  24. So Youtube just did some weird crap when I was trying to watch a video in my Playlist of Time Fighters and Time Fighters in the Land of Fantasy. When I went to the next part, it played a second then went to the reccomended videos. I had to refresh, go to the next part, and come back. Anyone else having problems like that. I know it's off topic but I got bored waiting for bores to do...anything really...

    ReplyDelete
  25. Here's an interesting thing buggin said funny how "she" doesn't understand irony. No one can give a complete and accurate review of a video game unless you play the game to the end, not some 5 to 10 minute lite version demo. Just goes to prove you are not a true gamer just like batdannight & friends ~

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You might want to quote that better. I don't understand where LB's statement begins.

      Delete
    2. Here's the entire thing just make sure that "she" doesn't say I am quote mining her.
      LadyBuggin777 1 hour ago

      @Douchie: You can call me Chris as mcuh as you like as I've come to realize that is your only defense in debating me. You must feek very inadequent in your person to pretend that I am Christopher Bores. Suit yourself, But the fact remains that you, batdannight, and the rest of your moron butt-buddies are all biased, in the dark, dishonest, and pathetic avgn azz kissers. No one can give a complete and accurate review of a video game unless you play the game to the end, not some 5 to 10 minute lite version demo. Just goes to prove you are not a true gamer just like batdannight & friends ~

      Delete
    3. "You must feek very inadequent in your person to pretend that I am Christopher Bores"

      Someone is getting incredibly freaked out about their secret being exposed.

      "moron butt-buddies are all biased, in the dark, dishonest, and pathetic avgn azz kissers"

      What is there to be ignorant about (in the dark)? The game sucks plain and simple and there obviously isn't any major change in gameplay or the like. Heck, one of the devs came to talk in the previous articles, I'm sure he can tell us if there's anything interesting we forgot to mention (unless that guy was some sort of troll).

      "No one can give a complete and accurate review of a video game unless you play the game to the end"

      Your son has never done that and has honestly never demonstrated a proper attempt to beat the game as the developer intended before reviewing it. Sorry Chris, you're not tricking anyone into buying your game just so they can 'review it properly' because if there's anything a demo is supposed to indicate, its the game-play and controls that can be expected for the entirety of the game.

      "Just goes to prove you are not a true gamer just like batdannight & friends"

      Since when do gamers have to review things? And why make the accusation of being Batdannight 'butt-buddies' twice? It makes the comment look exceptionally paranoid and insecure.

      Delete
    4. I think I may have hurt "her" ego a bit "she" said she was done talking to me but for how long whose to say.

      Delete
    5. Oh and here is her follow-up to me demanding her about it.
      LadyBuggin777 18 minutes ago

      @MicharionAQ: Every game he has reviewed he has played to the end BEFORE he even writes the script. He could not write a script for a game review without playing it first. Can you actually be that ignorant in your questioning? btw I am not a gamer, I don't play video games so I fail to see why you would make a comment about the irony of my last post on the IG sucks blog? That makes absolutely no sense??? My son and daughter are the video game players in our family, not me. You need to stop quote mining me to post on your biased forum, altogether ~

      Delete
    6. Edit: it appears that Russell Taaffe has decided to remove his comments and by extension, retract his responsibility for the game. Either he was afraid we would harass him (which didn't happen since we kinda ignored him} or he didn't want to get involved. I don't blame him either way.

      @the comment made by Chris

      "Every game he has reviewed he has played to the end BEFORE"

      Cheating or cutting to the last level does not count as 'played to the end'. Let's not begin with the games that can't be played to the end, like tetris or the games he didn't even bother to finish like resident evil 5 or Tekken... What about home improvement? Mission impossible? Chris is a person who doesn't know his own goddamn show and there's no reason why his own mother wouldn't know that (especially since she's so protective of her son).

      "he even writes the script"

      I am absolutely sure no writing was involved at anytime.

      " He could not write a script for a game review without playing it first."

      Sonic Generations says hi. The completely stolen footage says a lot about his inability to beat the game.

      "Can you actually be that ignorant in your questioning?"

      This statement is made in ignorance, its accusation is ignorant. No points awarded to the person who's supposed to pay super attention to their son and yet can't name proper elements of 'her' son's show. Makes sense for her to be chris considering that Chris can't properly describe his own show.

      "btw I am not a gamer, I don't play video games so I fail to see why you would make a comment about the irony of my last post on the IG sucks blog?"

      Three things wrong here
      1. Not a question
      2. If you're not a gamer, then how come you feel the need to state what a gamer is?
      3. Why state that you don't play video games? This writing is on par with the stupidity that Chris regularly performs!

      "That makes absolutely no sense???"

      What does? If anything you should be able to answer your own question Chris. You know why he pointed out your stupidity, its because he's hoping you will learn something.

      "You need to stop quote mining me to post on your biased forum, altogether"

      Here we have comma splice, sentence fragment, nonsensical accusation of quote mining despite said quotes being stand-alone and not really requiring context; accusations of bias when opposition has clear evidence.

      Can someone get that Billy Madison quote out here?

      Delete
    7. Yeah I even called her a hypocrite about being biased this is what she had to say.
      LadyBuggin777 41 minutes ago

      ITT: Don't tell me to shut up. I will back my son anyday of the week before I'll let you run him to the ground which he never deserved. You are a biased jack ass. I sure hope when you have chilf\dren you have to never put up with the hate you all give my son for no dayum good reason. Shame on you, all ~ One thing of note is that I told her to stop trying to pull the biased card I did not say for her to stop talking.

      Delete
    8. On what channel is this going down on? I wanna take a screencap!

      Delete
    9. Johnathan Hardwick's channel.

      Delete
    10. http://sdrv.ms/17qkpk1

      Just to show that there's no 'quote mining involved here'

      I also love how I am getting called out again despite having done nothing except post comments here. Is there something wrong with the guy not casting any stones?

      Delete
    11. http://sdrv.ms/17qltV0

      Wow so apparently because I don't like Chris I'm a murderous sociopath. I can take you to court Chris...

      Delete
    12. Also the reason why LB is taking so long to respond is because you used the complicated word 'sycophant'

      Delete
    13. Well she seems to have an irrational fear and hatred of anyone who posts anything that can be construed as against Bores. Funny how she assumes I care about bores. It is the trolls that he encourages that I am after.

      Delete
    14. I'd say something, but I don't feek adequent enough.

      Delete
  26. Let's relax, people. Watch this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wZhJ2vGj7E

    ReplyDelete
  27. Anybody remember that video Bores made on Yummy Mummy, and how he wants it resurrected. Well, looks like he's going to be getting his wish.

    General Mills announced they're going retro for their Halloween cereal lineup. As a result, they're bringing back discontinued cereals such as Yummy Mummy and Fruit Brute.

    Don't believe me? Here's an article:
    http://www.geeksaresexy.net/2013/08/23/all-5-general-mills-monster-cereals-returning-to-shelves-this-halloween/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He is probably going to whine that "breakfast is RUINED" because GM "took so long to bring it back"

      Delete
    2. There was a good reason they stopped making them before. They were nasty and no one bought the crap.

      Delete
    3. I wish I could find some contemporary reviews.

      Delete
  28. Looking up Mad Media Labs, it kinda looks like one of those weird Chinese Code Mill sites.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The company mispelt their own name on the lite app page... "Mad Media Mads Ltd"

      Delete
  29. TIGG probably stands for "The Irate Gamer Game".

    ReplyDelete
  30. Just wanna let you guys know, the game has been removed from the app store.

    ReplyDelete