Thursday, July 16, 2009

Where's Waldo? Avoiding the Irate Gamer.

Since some people thought his Back to the Future review was good (I’d ask why but then I remember people like Fred and Cloud8564whatever) Chris Bores made another video. But this time he reviews TWO games in one episode! Holy shit!

So let’s look at his review of Where’s Waldo on NES and The Great Waldo Search on SNES.

0:00 – 0:25: He starts off with a history lesson of Waldo talking about how the book series was a huge sensation that was sweeping the nation! Yeah who fucking cares about Waldo, he hasn’t been relevant in ages.

0:30 – 0:38: “And somebody at THQ thought it would be a good idea to turn this hit book series into a piece of shit video game” Because that’s the norm, if something is popular they’ll make a video game out of it no matter how stupid it is. That’s probably too nit-picky but his dialogue just sucks.

0:51 – 0:58: He starts off on easy… wow.

1:46 – 1:52: He finds Waldo but claims it’s easier to find a piece of cat shit, and edits a standard turd picture in and “finds it.” What’s the joke?

2:15 – 2:30: He mentions that you have to watch Waldo walk to the next location and you can’t skip it. So he makes a “joke” out of this by doing a montage of “waiting” moments. Keep it short and to the point! No one likes a gag that goes on.

Running Gag: He keeps on saying “Someone at THQ thought this would be a good idea for a game.” Dude, there’s a ton of movies and TV shows that would make terrible games, but companies still make them because it’s a business.

3:05 – 3:22: He complains the game’s lack of replay value (there’s a shock, talking about the ACTUAL GAME) in that it doesn’t have other Waldo characters, then proceeds to list them off. Oh yeah, because I totally remember those other Waldo characters, they sure were relatable Hahahaha someone kill me.

3:37 – 3:43: Despite the point of the game being “Waldo wants to go to the moon” he doesn’t understand why Waldo is on the moon.

3:48 – 4:03: Now he rants on how the game has no ending. That could have been avoided if you read the instruction manual you GORILLA-FACED FARTKNOCKER!

4:05 – 4:40: Then he begins to make up his own ending with text and everything. Padding is fun.

He starts his review of The Great Waldo Search

5:03 – 5:10: “Once you start the game you’ll see a vast improvement in the graphics. It’s much better then the original.” Because this is a Super Nintendo game and is capable of better graphics! What a shocking turn of events!

6:10 – 6:37: *breathes in* He finishes the game and complains about the length, and then compares it to other NES games like Super Mario World and Donkey Kong Country. THOSE ARE NOT NES GAMES YOU FUCKIGN TASTEJFSJDAFASFDAS *beeeep* There was a Little Spanish Flea, who wanted to be on TV.

So the review ends with a “game destruction” sequence where he puts the cartridges through a paper shredder. I don’t recall paper shredders being able to fit game cartridges but in Chris Bores mind anything can happen.

So what have we learned about Where’s Waldo and The Great Waldo Search? That someone at THQ thought it would be a good idea? I don’t know, I’m still taking the sedatives after that Super Mario World on NES comment. The next rant will be on his Goonies II video, which isn't that bad of a game.

9 comments:

  1. lol. So that's the review that stated SWM was on the NES. Always wondered what one it was from (I haven't watched all of his videos believe it or not. It's not healthy to do so).

    If I meet Chris Bores, I'm going to ask him what NES and SNES stand for.

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  2. Something tells me he actually knew that Super Mario World wasn't actually on NES but he forgot to pronounce the "S" in SNES. Still, that could have been avoided by doing two things:

    1. Actually watching videos before uploading them to notice if there are any major mistakes.

    2. Just calling it Super Nintendo. Few people actually call it SNES.

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  3. I'll point out that Super Mario World has 96 exits, not levels; so he apparently did not do his research very well.

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  4. At least he didn't take the Practice setting... durrrrrrrrrrr.......

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    1. Actually, he DID take it, as when I played it on "Easy", it had a timer, but on "Practice", there is no timer. The gameplay footage of the first level initially had no timer, as he lied and played on Practice.

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  5. I surprised that you didn't mention his repeated rant about the title of one the games having the word "Great" in it, despite the fact that it was named after one of the books, which he showed earlier.

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  6. I did cover that in the Redux Recap.

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  7. And the game happened just weeks after the book not even months just weeks

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  8. This was actually one of his better reviews. Still not perfect, but a far cry better than the videos he made recently with the stupid ass gags and bashing classics.

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