Why "Puppet Steve" Fails as a Kid's Show

You guys realize that this is a hobby right? I don't keep up with this full time.
I know I haven't done highlights for the first half of February, but since February is a short month, I'll just do the entire thing in one post. Especially as a bunch of videos are "Steve" at ToyFair 2017 and have very little to bring up. I will mention that Chris screwed up and showed his real hand in one of them. Probably would have gotten weird looks if he wore the felt gloves.

To hold you over, I'm going to respond to one piece of criticism I've been getting. "Puppet Steve is for kids, it doesn't have to be good, and is above your mocking".
No. Hell no.
The idea that something intended for kids doesn't have to be good is a disgusting mindset used by cynical assholes and greedy fat cats that think children will watch any crap you just throw on the screen. Children deserve better, and there is far better out there.

Puppet Steve is absolutely toxic to children. Here are some reasons why.

Pandering

This is where most kid's media fails, by pandering to the lowest common denominator. Fart jokes, poop jokes, bad puns, references, instead of trying to craft a narrative with well-written characters and conflicts. You can have the above sure, but don't let them take precedent.
"Puppet Steve" is nothing but pandering, but of a different kind. "Look at the toys! Look at my toys! I have toys! TOYS TOYS TOYS! Kids love toys! Love me kids! LOVE MEEEEEE and give me money!" He condescends to a child's love of toys in order to keep their attention. It's shameless and more parents should notice this.
The references only make things more annoying, especially when he references media that his uber-young audience has no idea about!
Unsurprisingly, Chris adores clickbait. Putting in subjects that have nothing to do with the video in the vain hopes of getting higher in searches. Like putting Lego in the title of a toy that isn't Lego. One bad example is when he looks at a Batman: Arkham City themed Harley Quinn statue, but he puts Suicide Squad in the title because "it's popular and will make me money".

Repetitive Flood of One Subject

Much like when Irate Gamer got a small boost in views with Skylanders and flooded the channel with related videos (and likely sped-up its death), Puppet Steve got a small boost in views when looking at Five Nights at Freddy's and now the majority of his videos are related to the haunted animatronics because "money money money". This will bite him when FNAF is no longer a hot property. But the overabundance of FNAF does hurt the channel when he also showcases other toys. He could expand on those but NOPE MORE FNAF GOTTA HAVE MORE FREDDY.

Now I am aware there are toy channels that specialize in one genre, like Transformers and Tokusatsu (Kamen Rider & Super Sentai/Power Rangers). However, those toys offer far more variety and value than the boring plastic FNAF figures Chris is always flaunting. That and those channels do something that Puppet Steve NEVER does.

Not a Real Review Show

Chris never actually reviews the toys he looks at. He'll briefly show something, but instead of going into detail he'll just tell a joke and move on. That's not how you review something.
The above mentioned Transformers and Toku toy channels actually go into detail, describe the positives and negatives, the toy quality, the ways to use it, if it's a good deal or price. Chris never goes into any of this. The most he'll say is "cool". I know that most of the toys he looks at are boring plastic figures with no articulation, but that turns around to another problem, Chris is limiting himself. There's plenty of entertaining toys to make reviews about, instead Chris just opts to do lazy "joke" showcases. He shouldn't call what he does a "review show", but a "showcase". "Hey kids, today I'm going to showcase this toy. Isn't it cool Zombie Steve?" Just throw away all pretense that this is a review.

Incapable of Taking Criticism

If you ever venture into the Puppet Steve comments, you might notice something among all the poorly spelled gibberish from 6 year olds. There's no negativity. "Perhaps he's just that good" No, this is YouTube, people will be negative about anything. Instead, Chris just hides every negative comment and pretends everything is perfect and happy. Amazing how after 10 years, Chris still can't take criticism.

Puppet Steve is Not a Good Role Model

To the parents hopefully reading this, your kids should not follow how Puppet Steve acts. He's insanely egocentric, but keeps trying to pretend he's a good guy. He isn't, he yells at his friends, he acts like a bully towards "Puppet Alex", he constantly has to stroke his own ego with the few times he does discuss Minecraft toys, it's all extremely annoying and makes him unlikable and unwatchable.

This wouldn't be the first time. Back on Irate Gamer, he was lauded as a hero and a chosen one, but he was extremely insensitive, rude and violent. Yet we were supposed to root for him because... reasons. He commits more evil than the actual "Evil Gamer". Oh god I hope we don't get an "Evil Steve".

There's No Actual Minecraft in "Minecraft Puppet Steve"

At the beginning, Chris wanted to make this the "Marty and Muffin" show. Same premise of toy non-reviews but with original characters. When that didn't catch on in an instant (seriously, only two videos) he looked up what's popular and decided "Minecraft". Hence, Minecraft Puppet Steve. However, the only reason is brand recognition and not actually playing the game. Yeah, there's no Minecraft gameplay on his channel. I don't think he's even played the game. I recall back in 2013, on his site he wrote a post about the South Park episode "Informative Murder Porn" where all the adults try to learn Minecraft after the kids blocked the "IMP" channels with a Minecraft related password, and in it Chris said "I never understood it".

And it's clear that even now, he still hasn't bothered to play it. In the videos where talks about Minecraft toys he makes mistakes. Like calling "The End" the "Enderzone" or that the Enderdragon breathes fire (it doesn't). This only showcases how completely cynical and soulless this whole show is, he just attached himself to a popular thing and trying to ride the train as long as he can before people get sick of it and he cries into his ghosts before going into another trend. You need to stop chasing trends Chris, find what you want.
Speaking of cynical...

Cynical, Lazy, and Insulting to Kids

I feel this is Puppet Steve's biggest crime. Chris does not want to entertain kids, he just wants money. He wants to put the least amount of effort in possible for maximum profit. He hated doing Irate Gamer because he had it be an effects showcase, and that's what his fans expected. With Puppet Steve, he barely has to put in effects, and if he does they're really basic ones like copying an image or green screen.
This connects to the above, how he'll do the bare minimum and hope for money. Chris doesn't understand that he needs to work harder, as eventually he'll lose his audience, just like he did with Irate Gamer. History can repeat if you don't learn from it. Being lazy and soulless like this is only going to drive people away.
You can deliver an entertaining product for kids, you need talent. Chris lacks that, and we know he lacks that, and I guarantee that when those children get older, they'll look back and realize "Wow, this is shit". It happened with Irate Gamer, and it will happen here. Side-note: Any other former IG fans want to provide testimonials? I'll be happy to share them.
Chris' lack of care is evident in every video. There is no passion. Chris doesn't know anything about the toys he's showcasing. It's evident when it took him like 30 videos to get Chica's gender right. Puppet Steve is nothing more than a product to throw at kids while ad revenue rolls in and he doesn't have to put in any effort. Pretty sure he copypastes his scripts too. You haven't earned a damn thing Chris, and I hope you realize that.

On another note, to any parents possibly reading, I should warn you that Chris Bores is a Pizzagate believer and possibly believes in other conspiracy theories. He listens to Alex Jones and he believes in ghosts. His attempt at conning people with his book Ghost Hunting 2.0 completely failed. I don't think you want your kids listening to a man that unironically believes in the guy that screams about chemicals turning the frogs gay.
Just keep an eye on what your kids are watching, they're the future.