I love April Fool’s Day, at least when it comes to the Internet. There’s a sense of glee that comes from watching people flip out over fake news and site changes. Announcing an impossible merger, showing clips from a movie that will never happen, or saying “I quit” followed by a “just kidding!”
Maddox has the best pranks overall, but this article from GameSpot should deserve special mention for how freakishly prophetic it was.
So let’s check out IG’s pathetic attempt at an April Fool’s joke with his review of Q*bert. Wait, why that game? It’s Q*bert, it doesn’t really need a review. My guess is he couldn’t find a game to fit his stupid storyline so he just chose something that’s popular.
0:18 - 0:31: The video starts with IG saying he hasn’t made a video in over a month (if we’re going by his retro reviews, that is correct) and YouTube told him if he doesn’t make another video he’ll be fired.
Really, is Chad Hurley or Steve Chen going to send you a pink slip signifying they’ll no longer put ads on your videos? If not making a video in a month constitutes getting fired, you would have lost your job before the Aladdin review. Maybe earlier than that.
Also, consider some of the people YouTube has “hired”. Shane Dawson, nuttymadam, RayWilliamJohnson, Fred, yeah you’re not going anywhere. See how this prank falls flat?
So “against his own will” he’s going to review Q*bert on the NES.
0:32 - 0:40: IG goes on saying that if you’ve been in an Arcade or had an Atari 2600 then this game should be familiar. By those actions, your fans will not recognize it. Silly Bores, thinking his fans are over 11.
0:40 - 0:50: He wonders what a “Q*bert” is and if you try to break the name down you come up with more questions than answers. During this he shows the name and replaces it with pictures of Q from Star Trek and Bert from Sesame Street.
This is where RESEARCH comes in handy. Q*bert’s original project name was “Cubes”, and the little character was going to be called “Hubert”. Then a member of the project combined the two words into “Cubert”, followed by art director Richard Tracy (heh, Dick Tracy) changing it to “Q-bert” (the dash was eventually replaced with an asterisk).
He probably ignored that in favor of more references.
0:51 - 1:11: So he starts to explain how the games works, as if we really needed this. He notes one of the enemies is walking on the wrong side of the cubes and asks “Hey buddy! What do you think this is, an Escher painting? I don’t think so!”
Once again your lack of research continues to shine. Artist Jeff Lee took great inspiration from the works of M.C. Escher when designing the game. In a way, this is an Escher painting. By the way, nice job mispronouncing his name.
1:12 - 1:49: Bores starts complaining about the controls and how they’re confusing.
You’re aware you can make this easier correct? When you start a new game, you’re given a screen explaining the controls and if you’re okay with them. You can alter them so they can be easier (you can change going Up-Right from simply Up to Up + Right). Hopefully this makes sense to the people reading.
He says you’d need a degree in “Q*bert physics” just to figure out the controls, as he says this he's reading from “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Q*bert”. LOOK AT MY PHOTOSHOP! ISN’T IT HILARIOUS?
He continues complaining about the controls and how he forgets which button does what and blah blah blah blah.
1:50 - 1:55: He notes how if an enemy gets him, Q*bert starts “swearing worse than a video game reviewer”. Hmm, stealth-reference to the AVGN and Armake or egotistical reference to himself? You make the call!
1:56 - 2:15: IG remarks the only way to defend yourself are the discs to the side, and how they sometimes clear out the enemies. However he complains that they don’t work all the time. Actually, they only clear the enemies if you can get Coily (the snake) to jump off the pyramid at the same time. It’s tricky but it works.
2:16 - 2:35: He says the results of the discs are just as “random” as the game show Press Your Luck. Chris, Press Your Luck wasn’t random.
In 1984, Michael Larson, an ice cream man from Ohio, went on the show and won over 100k because he learned the board only has a few set patterns. By using a VCR he memorized these patterns and used this knowledge to his advantage. After Larson’s episode, the board still wasn’t randomized it just added more patterns. The 2002 revival “Whammy” used a computer that always generated random patterns. But either way, Press Your Luck was not random.
However, explaining all this was pointless because that reference was setting up another lame sketch. This one with Bores playing and getting a Whammy, followed by the little red demon flipping the bird at him (and he follows suit, good lord his face is red).
You’ll also notice that the board was completely hand-made. This is one major problem I have with IG’s videos, he spends far too much time on pointless gags like this one than he does his own writing, acting, or overall quality. In the comments, he said that he spent hours recreating the board. A better alternative would have been taking footage from the show and imposing it on screen. Even better, not doing the joke at all!
2:36 - 3:05: Moving on, Bores points out an enemy that changes the tiles back to normal. He declares he’s had enough so… montage. Ugh, it’s Q*bert it doesn’t need a montage! As usual, we get forced anger shots and unconvincing Pac-Man Fever. At the end he mouths “motherfucker” and Q*bert’s curse balloon appears over him. Gee, did that take more time than the script?
3:05 - 3:18: IG points out how in later stages you have to jump on the tiles twice to get the right color. Once again, complaining that progressing further in a video game increases the difficulty. *sighs*
Bores declares the review is over and doesn’t care what YouTube thinks. “What’s the worse they’re going to do, fire me?” But didn’t you say earlier that if you didn’t do anything YouTube would fire you? So wouldn’t the same thing happen if you made a short video, it’s not like they’re run by the mob. Also, if making a short video gets you fired, you wouldn’t have a job after God of War III.
And just like a predictable comedy, a title card shows up saying “The All New Irate Gamer Show”. We then see that Bores has been replaced by *sighs* Michael Buckley of WhatTheBuck. For those unaware, WhatTheBuck is another one of the many awful shows supported by YouTube. A campy gay guy makes jokes about celebrity gossip that are about as funny as unused iCarly jokes.
The rest of the video has Buckley telling “jokes” involving a drunk Lara Croft, Michael Vick running illegal Pokemon fighting, and Princess Peach’s choice of fashion. If getting an airport cavity search sounds better than these jokes, then congratulations you’re over 12 years old and sane.
This video sucked. The subject of the prank immediately fell through the moment he said he would get fired, the choice of game was completely random, and that was less of a joke and more of a shameless plug to another shitty YouTube Partner.
I’m not sure if back then IG was more popular than WhatTheBuck, but it looks like Buckley no longer needs his promotion. He’s nearing 1 Million subs while Bores is constantly losing them. I don’t see the appeal, if I wanted to watch someone make fun of celebrity and excess, I’d watch The Soup. At least Joel McHale isn’t an annoying gay stereotype.
Next redux we’ll look at a video where Bores says “You think I can only steal from the AVGN? Ha! You ain’t not seen nothing yet!”
*looks at his site* He promised two videos before the holidays. You think he can do it? He still hasn’t released the trailer for History of Lies Part 4.