IG in 2010: The Top Ten Worst Moments

2010 is coming to a close, man that year just flew by didn’t it? Let’s close out by looking at the Top 10 Worst IG/CB Moments of 2010. Yeah, no “end of the world” speech this time. Chris’ output this year was embarrassing. He somehow did worse than last year. You can read that list here: http://irategamersucks.blogspot.com/2009/12/ig-in-2009-top-ten-worst-moments.html Two Irate Gamer videos (Educational Mario Games [counting both parts as one] and Cool Spot) Seven Neo “reviews” (Ghostbusters, Dante’s Inferno, the 3-in-1 review, God of War III, Xbox 360 Comparison, Castlevania: Harmony of Despair, and Donkey Kong Country Returns) One History of Video Games (Early Atari arcade games) Three movie “reviews” (Top 10 Summer Movies, Iron Man 2, and Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time) Two “Breakfast Rant 2.0” videos (Kool-Aid Flavors and Garbage Pail Kids) TWENTY-ONE E3 videos that amount to saying “vewy coo’” at pre-rendered trailers, awful interviews with the same questions asked again and again, and information that has been available a good MONTH before these videos came out EIGHTEEN “Other” videos (that includes trailers, bloopers, updates, and contests) Disgusting. So as you can see I don’t have much to choose from. But let’s try shall we? HOLD IT! What about History of Video Games Part 4? Aren’t you going to wait for that? Yeah, I don’t think it will come out today. If it does then it’s a 2011 video. UPDATE: What do you know, it didn't come out on the 31st. #10: Who needs substance? I only care about flashy effects! The only moment on here related to his movie reviews. This year’s Top 10 list showed the only thing Bores is looking for in a movie is special effects. Yeah I know he’s done that before, but here it’s really egregious and very annoying. It surprises me he dislikes Michael Bay considering he’s the target audience of his films. The fact he put The Sorcerer’s Apprentice at #2 solely on the effects shows how much he loves shiny things. Oh and he broke another promise. He said at the end he would review most of the movies on the list. He only reviewed two. Bad form Chris. #9: Hours of research = Al “Acorn” and fake footage In the time leading up to History of *yawns* Part 3, Chris made multiple bold statements. Including “doing hours of research”, finding footage of games that exists nowhere else on the Internet, and saying it took a long time because “info on the Internet is inaccurate”. Ignoring the hypocrisy of that last one, the final result showed that most of those claims were outright lies. Most of what he said was copied exactly from Wikipedia. He got the name of Atari’s lead engineer wrong (it’s Al Alcorn not Acorn), tried to pass of Nolan Bushnell seeing the Magnavox Odyssey as a myth rather than a fact (spoiler: it’s a fact) and outright stealing footage from better documentaries on the subject. Oh, and recreating 2 of the 6 games… BADLY! Hours of research huh? #8: The laziest God of War review in history! At the end of the 3-in-1 video, Bores announced he would review God of War III. He finally got to it… four months later. Obviously the delay was to make it good right? Hahahaha no. Instead we got a review that was less than two minutes long and told us information we could find by reading the back of the box. His fans were outraged at how lazy this was, people unsubscribing in droves. Some thought it was the trailer, then they realized this was the actual review. I’m shocked GotGame allows him to get away with this. #7: Every Castlevania fan wants Simon Belmont in all the games! Bores was upset that a certain Castlevania character didn’t show up in Harmony of Despair. The original hero Simon Belmont. Oh wait, it wasn’t just HoD, he’s upset that ALL the new Castlevania games don’t include him. Bores, the original Castlevania took place in 1691, Simon was 24 years old. All the new Castlevania games take place centuries after that, sometimes before. Order of Ecclesia in the 1800s, Portrait of Ruin in 1944, and Dawn of Sorrow in the not-to-distant future of 2036. Again, this is nothing new. You’re not a Castlevania fan, stop lying! #6: A split timeline plot without any differences The first IG review of 2010 was for games already covered by the AVGN. As usual, people called him out on this. When the videos came out, Bores did something much different. Not that it was a good thing. IG used a Sliding Doors plot where we saw separate timelines depending on which game he chose. What makes plots like this work is spotting the differences between the two. In the Frasier episode “Sliding Frasiers” (where Bores clearly stole the idea from), the story splits between Frasier wearing a suit or wearing a sweater. In the Malcolm in the Middle episode “Bowling”, the story splits between Hal taking the boys bowling or Lois taking the boys bowling. When you watch you try to spot the differences between the timelines. That’s the fun of it. In Bores’ video, the only difference was Ronnie. In both timelines, Ronnie showed up out of nowhere. In one timeline Bores tells him to leave, and in the other says he can stay. Then Bores breaks a gas pipe in both timelines (just go with it), leading to the ultra-predictable conclusion. Of course for this to work Bores couldn’t know what gas smells like and pretend that there’s nothing wrong. Hack writing at its best. #5: The pace of History of Video Games I included this on last year’s list because he only made three videos and only reached 1972 (I’m saying three now since he didn’t release the Odyssey videos at the same time, like he did with the ET and Educational Mario Games reviews). One year later he’s only made one episode, talking about Pong and other early Atari games. It’s taken 19 months for Bores to get this far. In that time a sensible filmmaker would have finished it by now. Only covering important events and not every single fucking console ever made. The only explanation I can give to his claim of the SNES being Part 40 is if each part is one console or one event in video game history. That’s my theory anyway. Give up Chris. Your fans don’t care about video game history, all their comments are “Lol I find Waldo”, “TYE fihter that so random lololol” or “Lololol 64 devil lol”. And if people really wanted to learn the history, they wouldn’t go to some asshole that thinks it’s “clever” to include a 2001: A Space Odyssey parody in a video intended to inform. #4: HD video makes everything better! In the months leading up to the Cool Spot video, Bores bragged that with an HD camera his show will be taken to the next level. He was ignorant to the fact that High Definition only improves the picture quality and does nothing to help his writing. But he was confident that his series will evolve in HD. The final result… the same shit he’s always been doing. He still had lame sketches, he still failed at playing the games, nothing about this video indicated a “next level” other than a clearer picture. Which in the long-run really only works for modern games. It also doesn’t help when you still use the stock effects from Particle Illusion! #3: Subscribe, join this site, and win a PS3. It’s totally not a scam! A while back Bores put up a video announcing a contest. The winner would get a PS3 and five games. All you had to do was subscribe to his channel, sign up to DealDash.com, bid on items, and leave a comment with your DD username. THIS SOUNDS TOTALLY REAL! As you might suspect, DealDash is a complete scam. Even if Plagueus1742 did receive a PS3, in the long-run the whole site is shady. Plus, Bores didn’t contact DealDash. They contacted him and many other YouTube partners. Including TheArchfiend, who used that knowledge to expose Bores for falling for such an obvious scheme. Strange how this contest started a few days after a certain review was uploaded… #2: Bores goes to E3... AGAIN! Uggggh. It’s bad enough that he went last year, it’s worse that he went for a second time! Since GotGame is run by morons, they invited Chris to E3 again. Not only that, but they gave him more interviews! Didn’t those idiots see the ones he conducted in 2009? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2RpyHyuuqaA G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySdAvVboxls Marvel Ultimate Alliance 2 This should have been a foreboding sign. He can’t handle himself live. Which is why he kept asking the same questions over and over and over and over! It’s insulting that a clear fraud gets to go but people that really do care about video games are left out. Shame on you GotGame. If it’s any consolation, he’s absolutely awful at Marvel vs. Capcom 3. #1: The entire 3-in-1 “review” Like the Aladdin video, the 3-in-1 special represents everything that is wrong with the Irate Gamer. Failure to do research, piss-poor writing, absolute laziness, side characters that have nothing to do with the game, and bashing a great game for insanely idiotic reasons. Chris did this video for the sake of “honoring” requests. His idea of that is play for an hour and call it a full review. He outright admitted he only played Brutal Legend for an hour, and his one complaint made zero sense (WHAT SOUND ISSUES?!). He judged Tekken 6 on the beat-em-up campaign and not the actual fighting portion. Then he re-released the video where he does play the fighting portion, revealing he has no clue what Tekken is and that he’s too retarded/lazy to look in other menus. Also, his “joke” about getting paid off sounded sincere and not sarcastic. As for TMNT: Turtles in Time Reshelled. You can tell he didn’t get past Sewer Surfin if you have knowledge of the Arcade and SNES versions. Reshelled is based off the Arcade version so it doesn’t have stages and bosses added to the SNES port. Since Bores complained that they “replaced” the Roadkill Rodneys with boxing robots, it’s obvious he’s not familiar with the Arcade version. I also believe he didn’t get past Sewer Surfin because in the SNES port you fight the Rat King then go into the Technodrome, while in the Arcade version you go straight to Prehistoric Turtlesaurus. This video proves that Chris Bores is a lazy moron that only cares for money. He never cared for his fans or the games he plays. How GotGame allowed this deplorable video is beyond me. Well then, that’s it for 2010. I know there are some moments I left out, but hey there will be more embarrassments next year. I wish you all a Happy New Year. I hope you have a pleasant one.