Man, we haven’t seen anything new from Bores in a while. I don’t feel like doing a redux recap, yet I want to write something. I know! Quickly, to the Chris Bores Vault! Codename: y2b2006
Yes, we’re venturing back to IG’s first YouTube channel. Something that I rarely visit because there’s very little material.
There’s 12 videos total.
5 are short Haunted Investigators commercials
The video “Back to the Past“. See the post about that here: http://irategamersucks.blogspot.com/2010/01/time-machine-that-removes-your-emotions.html
A short video where Bores utilizes split-screen and abuses After Effects for “DBZ Style Fighting”. You know I remember characters on DBZ actually using their fists most of the time, it wasn’t just fireballs.
Another short video that abuses After Effects, this time with Bores being attacked by “fire” for no reason.
A “joke” video with Bores recording Egyptian artifacts, ending on “Thermostat: 4000 BC”. I can see where the Irate Gamer comedy comes from.
An upload of the Mansfield Reformatory segment on ABC Family’s “Scariest Places on Earth”. An excuse to plug the Haunted Investigators episode he did on the prison.
And finally, the subject of this recap. Two MythBusters parodies.
For those unaware, MythBusters is a long-running scientific show on Discovery Channel. Special effect experts Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman use science to determine the validity of various stories, movie scenes, and myths. The shows overuse of explosions and fire make it amazing parody fodder. This on the other hand… let’s just get through it.
I’ll only be covering the first parody in this post, I’ll get to the second one eventually.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGZR9AnypvI Here’s the video.
One title card later.
0:16 - 0:51: We open on “Adam” and “Jamie” giving their safety disclaimer “Don’t try this at home. We’re what you call ‘professionals’.” This is something that does happen on the show, however I wouldn’t call these two “professionals”.
We then get the MythBusters intro, here it’s a combination of clips from the show and clips from this spoof. The spoof clips consist of “Adam” and “Jamie” poorly reciting famous lines from the show, “Am I missing an eyebrow?” “I reject your reality and substitute my own” “Quack damn you!” and so on. I love how the clips from the real MythBusters make sure not to show the faces of the actual hosts, and how the quality between the two is extremely jarring.
So who’s filling the shoes? Adam is being played by Bores himself, because he’s such a dead ringer for Adam Savage.
Jamie is played by Brad Harp, who’s better known as the Genie in the Aladdin video. Why do I get the feeling he’ll be using the same flat tone and delivery here?
I also want to make something perfectly clear. Buddhist Priest Alan Cicco is not the Genie, it’s just a coincidence that they both have big full beards. I shouldn’t have to tell you this since his name is not in the credits to the Aladdin video, yet people still believe this. Though to be fair, knowing that would require one to sit through that disastrous video.
0:52 - 1:29: The first myth of the show, rubbing two sticks together to create fire. The real MythBusters did this in episode 45 “Shredded Plane”, which oddly enough aired the same day when this video was uploaded (January 18th 2006). Myth was confirmed through the use of a drill and gunpowder.
Adam brings up that it’s almost Thanksgiving… okay maybe the video was recorded in November, I won’t fault him for getting the timing off here.
Adam wants to do three myths related to the holiday, starting with “rubbing sticks”. Jamie believes using steel would work, but Adam disagrees.
Two things you’ll immediately notice. The acting is appalling, both of them sound completely bored out of their minds. Brad looks like he’s about to fall asleep.
The other thing is the editing, it’s a nightmare. At one point, we get a wide-shot of the two with Bores speaking, and then it cuts to a close-up of him finishing his line. Did they not have a good take of him finishing the line that they had to do that extremely sloppy cut?
1:30 - 2:34: Adam attempts his experiment by literally rubbing two sticks together without a third source of energy. You need another energy source to allow the fire to stay there, by just rubbing the sticks together you get nothing.
Jamie starts speaking and you’ll notice yet another problem, the sound quality is awful. I can barely hear him over the goddamn banjo music!
You’ll also notice the narrator is played by Bores, doing a piss-poor job at it.
Adam keeps rubbing the sticks not realizing that the task is futile. The narrator exclaims he’s been going at it for an hour, which Adam repeats 5 seconds later. Keep in mind, there was intended effort put into this.
“Finally after a tireless effort, he finally throws in the towel”. Repetition is fun!
I’m kind of surprised he didn’t add a fake explosion, maybe this was before Bores believed in “explosions = comedy”.
2:35 - 4:27: “I look like an ass trying to one-up you” … Way too easy.
Adam wonders where the myth originated and Jamie thinks he has the answer from an old boy scout manual.
Jamie then explains his method of starting a fire with friction. At this point, one will realize the biggest problem with this video. IT’S! NOT! A! PARODY!
A parody exaggerates certain aspects for comedy, for a MythBusters parody one would make fun of the overuse of explosions, or in Robot Chicken’s case, turn them into Ghostbusters using their Proton Packs on myths.
However, nothing about this is exaggerated for comedy. Everything is taken seriously and they’re trying to apply actual science to the “myths”. If anything, this is a direct copy rather than an affectionate spoof. I hate to bring up the old “Chris Bores is an unoriginal hack” remark, but it really shines through here.
At one point, Jamie insults Adam and he yells “I heard that!” from off-screen. I have a feeling Bores isn’t too proud of these videos, it makes him look like an idiot and he can’t have his “perfect image” tainted.
Jamie continues building whatever it is he’s doing, honestly there’s nothing here to make fun of. When he finishes up, Adam shows up to “goof off”, takes two sticks and pretends to drum Jamie’s head. Look, I know Adam is kind of nutso on the show, but he’s not an idiot. Bores is portraying him as an annoying moron. Is this supposed to be the parody aspect? Because it’s not funny!
4:28 - 5:16: Jamie tests outs his contraption, and surprisingly he’s able to get smoke. However, he wasn’t able to get fire. Why is Bores making the narrator sound really derpy?
5:17 - 5:27: Adam wonders what Jamie’s next idea is, he responds he can make it happen with “flint and steel”. Adam proceeds to mock him. Wow, that’s mature. I’d ask if Bores has ever seen the show, but then I remembered the intro footage. This is so lame.
5:28 - 6:29: Jamie gets the flint & steel to work, even though it’s not “rubbing two sticks together”. Adam hits the burning pieces with a stick because he “can’t resist playing with fire”. That looks less like playing and more like “Oh crap fire! I need to put it out now!” Jamie then calls Adam a bed-wetter. Was that meant to be a joke?
6:30 - 6:57: The duo discuss if the myth is busted, Adam claims it’s “half-busted” but then they settle on outright Busted. Well, you could always declare it Plausible, that is one of their options. Just saying…
6:58 - 7:31: The second myth “Will eating turkey make you tired?” Well, turkey does contain L-tryptophan, an amino acid that can induce sleep. But when it comes to Thanksgiving there’s multiple aspects involved in making people sleepy. Mostly over-eating and booze.
Their plan of action is to buy a big turkey, Jamie will eat a moderate amount and Adam will gorge himself.
Adam: You know I like to gorge myself.
Jamie: Yeah, we all know that by your figure.
Heh, the video itself is making fun of Bores for me.
7:32 - 7:56: We cut to sped-up footage of a road as they “search” for a turkey. “Luckily a grocery store was open” Luckily? Either grocery stores are a luxury in Ohio or this is more of Chris’ shitty writing. How much you want to bet they didn’t ask permission to film in the grocery store?
7:57 - 8:25: We then cut to a woman that seems to be stuck in a slideshow, the narrator claims she’s the “resident folklorist”. Her name is Ruthie B. Hayes. GET IT?! LIKE RUTHERFORD B. HAYES?!
I’d tell you what she says but I can barely hear her. More of that wretched sound mixing. Also she keeps jump-cutting all over the place. Remember that before Bores created the Irate Gamer, he was a professional video editor for weddings and other events. I have a feeling these people were ripped off.
8:26 - 9:32: They take the turkeys out of the oven and we watch them eat, and eat, and eat. Does Epic Meal Time have a new video up? Bacon strips bacon strips bacon strips bacon strips bacon strips bacon strips oh hey I’ve lost my mind.
9:33 - 10:38: Adam stops stuffing his face and the duo proceed to phase two, digesting the turkey. So we watch them sit, and sit, and sit, and DAMN IT!
We get a brief reprieve with Jamie saying he’s getting sleepy, and then we watch them sit some more. Folks, go to YouTube and search for clips of the real MythBusters. I can guarantee it’s far more exciting than this shit!
Near the end, Adam “pranks” Jamie by tickling his nose while he sleeps. *sighs* Even his pranks are lame! Draw a dick on his face, pour water on his pants, shave part of his beard, do something that can actually be called a prank.
10:39 - 11:00: We cut to the duo discussing if the myth is confirmed, they both got tired so they decided it’s Plausible. Wait, so they do know about the Plausible ranking? Then why didn’t they use it for the “rubbing two sticks” myth? At least I know there’s only one myth left in this damn video.
11:01 - 11:49: The third myth “Will playing a didgeridoo in front of a plant cause it to bend over?” I’ve never heard this one, they claim they found it off the internet. What does this have to do with Thanksgiving?
They go over the plan, play other sounds before using the didgeridoo.
11:50 - 13:44: Their first test is to play bass guitar, this sure is exciting.
When their setting up, Adam pretends to rock out and then pretends to strangle himself with the cord, asking for help. Jamie nonchalantly says “I’m not helping him”. I can see where he’s coming from.
Jamie then plays various chords, none of which cause the plant to move. Meanwhile I’m trying to stay awake through this dull-fest.
13:45 - 14:52: After seeing the bass guitar failed, they immediately move on to the didgeridoo. What about the other instruments? Are you just giving up?
They start working on making their own didgeridoo. Wouldn’t it be cheaper just to buy your own? I looked online and they range from $25-$30 dollars. That’s a really good deal for an instrument.
After a commercial for Foster’s Beer (to reference what a didgeridoo sounds like) we see Adam and Jamie fight with the PVC pipes, ending with Jamie hitting Adam and saying “I like seeing Adam get hurt.” Another thing we agree on!
14:53 - 15:20: We then get a montage of the duo creating their instruments, a montage that makes the two of them look really incompetent with tools.
15:21 - 16:34: We see their final product, and you can clearly tell they just bought them.
“Blue Man Group eat your heart out!” God damn it Bores…
Jamie’s instrument is in the key of D, he tests his out and it works. Adam’s instrument is in the key of A, he tests his and he suuucks. He concludes that it’s broken only for Jamie to do it correctly. You know, the real Adam Savage wasn’t this rock stupid.
“The only thing that can lift his spirits is a rousing tribal dance” What? Oh no no NO! *sees Bores dancing* Stop just stop you’re embarrassing everyone! Jeez…
16:35 - 17:28: After a long sequence of nothing, we finally see the test. Both didgeridoos have no effect on the plant. Well that was a waste of time!
The video ends with the two of them declaring the myth Busted. I had a feeling it would.
Then we get credits stolen right from the real show. I refuse to buy that all these people worked on this rinky-dink production, just more of Chris’ unoriginality.
Holy crap, this was atrocious!
Bored actors, sound mixing where you could BARELY hear what people were saying, sloppy editing, and it was BORING!
The only good part was Brad insulting Bores, even if they were “in-character”. These days Bores would never make fun of himself.
As for the second video, I’ll wait a bit before getting to it. I want to see if Bores releases something new… ever.