Before we tackle the Friday video, here’s a short write-up about the Wednesday video
Bores has started a new “series”, “Best of Irate Moments”. … Can’t you write “Irate Gamer Moments”? Why are you so opposed to writing Gamer?
As the title suggests, it’s Bores showing what he believes to be his best moments. Rather, it’s Bores over-explaining his jokes!
Here, he showcases his parody of the G.I. Joe PSAs from that same review. Prefacing the short scene by explaining how G.I. Joe had PSAs! I know I’ve asked this before, but do you really take your audience for idiots Chris?
He also claims that there’s not many pictures of Flint on the internet. … I can Google “Flint G.I. Joe” and find a lot of pictures. Flint wasn’t some obscure one-shot character, he was a main Joe. Were you just being lazy? Did you just type "Flint" and hope that was good enough? You need to be specific for names like that. He's not someone like Monkey D. Luffy where the name is unique enough to know what you want.
Can’t wait to see more self-indulgent “best of” moments.
Anyway, the Friday video.
It’s actually a Neo episode. Holy crap they exist! His first one since South Park: The Stick of Truth back in … March 2014. Shit, it’s really been a year.
I recall that he said on Facebook that even making IG Neo was “too much time”, after having said Neo videos were “low effort” and he could “easily whip them up”. Pick a story and stick with it! I guess we’re back to “low effort” now.
What game will he look at? Mario Party 10. Whoa, really? That only came out a week ago. That’s a pretty speedy turnaround for Bores.
Going by the title though, this sounds more like “Amiibo featuring Mario Party 10”
Also, I think this is his first review of a Nintendo title in a long time. Wii U titles beforehand were third party (Sonic Lost World, Rayman Legends). *checks* Yep, last Nintendo title was New Super Mario Bros. 2 back in February 2013.
The video opens and look at all the Amiibo on his desk. I hope those were obtained out of pocket and not given to him. I see he added “Smash Bros” Yoshi, “Smash Bros” Bowser, “Super Mario” Mario, “Super Mario” Luigi, and Toad.
He says there’s actually two reviews. One on YouTube, and one on GotGame. Shit… didn’t expect to pull double duty. Not sure why the actual game review is GotGame “exclusive”, it’s also uploaded to YouTube. Albeit unlisted. Maybe his contract only allows him to review modern games at GotGame? No… he’s posted modern game reviews to YouTube as well. He’s just inconsistent and weird.
The YouTube only video will be his overview of the Amiibo that work with the “Mario 10 game” (his words not mine).
He goes over how Mario Party 10 came with a new line of Amiibo, how the Mario figure is exclusively bundled with the game.
“You can’t buy them individually until… mid-April sometime” Actually it’s April 3rd, NoA announced this yesterday. You would know this if you followed them on Twitter.
Blah blah blah…
Different games have different bases. He mentions the rumored Splatoon amiibo. “I have no idea what that game’s about” YOU WERE AT E3 LAST YEAR! They had the game! How did you not see it?! Oh right, he was probably too busy in the Skylanders booth…
He states that nine Amiibo work with the game. Kind of… You have the six new Mario characters, but then there’s the six Smash Bros versions, plus three others that only have Smash Bros Amiibo at the moment (Rosalina, Donkey Kong, and Wario). So it’s more 15.
The non-Mario Amiibo are “Read Only” and merely provide Scratch Tickets that give bonuses. Reading this off the Amiibo wiki (yes, it exists),
“They released five new ones” Incorrect! They released SIX new ones! Mario, Luigi, Yoshi, Peach, Bowser, and Toad. This isn’t counting the Golden Mario.
He even lists the characters, and somehow doesn’t realize it’s six. Also, he just calls Peach “Princess”. What is his aversion to saying “Peach” and “Zelda”? He always just calls them “Princess”.
He states he picked up Luigi because he didn’t like the Smash Bros version. What? How can you not like the Luigi Plank?
He says “five” again. MATH!
He has the Golden Mario! That also better be out of his pocket. If he’s going to start doing this, he has to pay for his Amiibo like the rest of us. I pre-ordered my Golden Mario, I got mine!
He cuts to gameplay. With face cam.
Hold on, is he recording the TV with his fucking camcorder? HE’S GOING BACKWARDS!
He just explains how the Amiibo work. If you care, you can obviously find other BETTER sources.
After that, he just drones on some more … mentions Toad is hard to find (I hear he’s getting easier now) and that’s essentially it.
Right then, onto the actual game review.
0:05 - 0:18: Instead of sitting at his table, IG is on his couch, filmed in a little square over his TV in the background. … He’s going even more backwards! This is a terrible way to film your review.
0:19 - 1:12: The face cam then cuts to the corner and he really is filming the TV with this camcorder. GotGame… how have you not dumped him?
IG starts by reading off the menu options, he goes to Bowser Party and is “unsure” about something. Yeah, this is the worst possible way to do a review. Off-the-cuff “impressions” as you play.
He shows the Bowser Party games, and picks Jewel Drop (a Puyo Puyo knock-off). Instead of explaining what Jewel Drop is, he brings up that Mario Party… is a Party game. What gave THAT away?
Also, the TV cuts to a different segment while he says it. I don’t know what’s going on.
1:13 - 1:50: We then get another cut. He says there’s “two main modes” with Mario Party and Bowser Party. … Wait, shouldn’t this have gone before the Bowser Party segment? Did you even script this? I mean, there’s editing so he did put it through post, but did he plan this out in any way, shape, or form?
He mentions it’s a “group experience” again. Was the Bowser Party segment an unused take he forgot to remove?
He lists the stages because… that needed to happen.
1:51 - 2:53: He starts trying to explain the game. It’s a board game with mini-games. He doesn’t mention the stupid car mechanic they introduced in 9. Then again, that would imply he played any of the previous Mario Party games. R.I.P. Hudson Soft…
“What’s interesting about the Wii U version is that the Game Pad… is a new feature on this” … He seriously said this. This is yet another reason he fails as a critic, he is way too fucking obvious in everything he says! No shit the Game Pad is “new”, it’s the first Mario Party game on Wii U, the console that attempts to make use of the Game Pad. Even at this point when Nintendo knows they screwed up, they’re going to keep making use of it (like with Splatoon and the now delayed Zelda).
IG enlarges his face cam to explain how the Game Pad functions. Charge your Game Pad Chris! I can see the red light!
Anyway, he explains how Bowser is locked up in the Game Pad and the locks correspond with dice rolls and he can get free
2:54 - 4:13: He goes over some of the mini-games… I don’t care…
He says things are a lot more fun with more people, and you can “duke it out” and “trash talk each other”. Thanks for telling me what I can do in local multiplayer Chris. I was so lost without your benevolent wisdom.
Blah blah blah blah blah…
4:14 - 4:47: He cuts back to the main menu and gives a boring explanation on how Bowser Party works. Zzzzzz
The video ends back at the main menu.
IG says the game is an “experience”, and then claims that “every game for the Wii U is based on the family experience”. Are you kidding me?! Zombi U, The Wonderful 101, Wind Waker HD, Bayonetta 2, Lego City Undercover, Shovel Knight, the upcoming Xenoblade Chronicles X and Devil's Third, these are games that don’t have multiplayer OR are not appropriate for “family experiences”.
Then he says he tells people “don’t get a Wii U unless you have many people to play with” *headdesk* His ignorance is limitless. Even the games with multiplayer like Super Mario 3D World, Donkey Kong Country Tropical Freeze, Mario Kart 8, and Super Smash Bros are fun on their own (the latter help thanks to online… which Bores likely never uses). Even in videos as boring as this you find ways to piss people off!
“If that’s your demographic, that’s great. If not then go with the PS4 or Xbox One”. Show me where I can play Nintendo exclusive titles on those Chris? Oh that’s right. Especially when more and more games are being released in an unfinished state. That's why the Wii U Zelda was delayed, they still had work to do and felt like they couldn't finish it this year. Plus the mountain of disappointments like Titanfall, Destiny, Evolve, The Order 1886. At least Bloodborne is awesome.
This feels like more “Nintendo is kiddy” garbage.
EDIT: I went to check on the video to see the dislikes (it has a lot). I read through the comments (there was barely any) and one mentioned a "disappearing Game Pad" at 5:04. I checked and there's a Jump Cut where the Game Pad disappears from Chris' hand. More sloppy editing. You really couldn't do the line in one take?
This is an odd video. The middle is extremely boring, but there’s the major editing problems in the beginning, and his ignorance at the end. I’m just at a loss for words.
Monday then? Maybe?