Not much to 2020 yet. No GeekTime for starters (now watch as soon as this post goes up, a new episode appears)
That promised video about ghost hunting shows? Delayed or cancelled because, according to him, he got another opportunity to pitch a ghost hunting show of his own. Yeah, this proves that a lot of his anger and bitterness came from jealousy of not having a show.
At this point, I'm convinced that Puppet Steve is nothing more than a tactic to fund his ghost garbage. Even though a real show would have a producer...
Speaking of Puppet Steve
On January 13th, he uploaded a video about mini Street Fighter cabinets. During it he had a dumb segment involving Ryu and Ken action figures. However, the voice of Ken sounds a little familiar. A certain Philly accent.
One quick look at the description, and you realize... it's James Rolfe. Yeah, the Angry Video Game Nerd has appeared in a video produced by Chris Bores. What the hell?
Clearly, we don't have the full story.
I don't think this will lead to a full-blown crossover. Screenwave likely sees Chris as a total nobody now and won't bother to bring him in for a video.
My guess? Chris contacted James using his Puppet Steve name, and asked to record some lines as Ken from Street Fighter for a "popular kids channel". James, being a nice guy, recorded it without knowing it was Chris. He's too busy to look it up.
But until we get answers, all we can do is speculate.
What's weird is that Chris also credits "the Irate Gamer" in the description of the video. Even though Steve and IG are the same person. We're not dumb Chris.
Also, he doesn't credit him as James Rolfe, but as "AVGN". Really?
A shame the ghost rants got delayed. I had popcorn and everything to see him lose his shit over a couple dumb shows, and not in a funny way like Mike Stoklasa talking about Ghost Adventures.
Saturday, January 18, 2020
Sunday, January 5, 2020
The Worst Moments of the Decade
It’s a brand-new era. An
all new “Roarin’ 20’s”. Let’s hope it doesn’t end the same way as the last 20’s.
For Chris Bores, it was an
on & off decade of videos, and a lot of downtime. All while making a total
ass of himself. Amazing that he never learns.
And like many others, the
start of a new decade is a time to reflect. So, let us dive back and look over
the worst Irate Gamer/Chris Bores moments from 2010 to 2019. From his I Rate
the 80s about *checks note* Kool-Aid Flavors to the charisma vacuum GeekTime.
These will be in order of chronology (to the best of my ability), so don’t
scroll down and expect a “#1”.
The 3-in-1 Review
In order to make up for a
lack of videos, Chris decided to review three different modern (at the time)
games in one video. Brutal Legend, Tekken 6, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles:
Turtles in Time Reshelled. To call this video a dumpster fire would be too kind.
He barely played Brutal
Legend, admitting he only played it for an hour (real professional). He barely
played TMNT, implying he only got to the second level and his comparisons to
the original weren’t of the Arcade version, but the SNES version. Revealing
that he still thinks Turtles in Time was a Super Nintendo exclusive.
But by far the worst one
was his look at Tekken 6. Rather, the game’s Scenario mode. Not realizing Tekken
was a fighting game, he jumped right into the story mode where the gameplay is
different and not representative of the Tekken experience. Compiled with calling
out reviews on the back of the box for praising it, as well as complaining
about the Japanese voice acting (had he played longer, he would know that
characters in Tekken speak their native tongue, and come across characters speaking
English). It was so bad that when he released the video to YouTube after some
time on GotGame, he added a new segment where he looks at the fighting game
portion of the fighting game. Only to say it sucks because “I prefer Mortal
Kombat”. A flimsy excuse and a poor attempt at covering his ass.
People hated this video as
it really exposed what a poser and moron he really is. As well as how insanely
lazy he could really get. Chris didn’t learn from this, making a lazy review of
God of War III months later that amounted “Cool action and there’s sex scenes”,
and years later he tried it again with “Review Roundup” where he looked at FOUR
games in one video. But the original is by far the worst, and among Chris’
dumbest moments.
“The Rise of Red” storyline.
Throughout the Summer of
2010, Chris would announce that he purchased HD cameras and use them to take
his show into “bold new directions”. By which he means “include a storyline in
my reviews”. Inspired by the rise of serialized television and (possibly) other
content creators implementing similar ideas (e.g. Lewis “Linkara” Lovhaug),
Chris decided to produce a “big epic Irate Gamer story arc”. It went about as
well as you think.
Spanning three and a half
years from October 2010 to April 2014, thanks in part to Chris taking MONTHS to
do a single video, this “storyline” consisted of cliché villains, trite story
beats, and a finale that … uses Power Rangers footage. Not even attempting to emulate
his own, just directly stealing Mighty Morphin Power Rangers footage. There was
even a point where the storyline didn’t progress at all, making people believe it
was just cancelled. Chris never even met the main villain (the incredibly unoriginal
“Shadow Overlord”), not to mention the Irate Gamer felt more like a villain than
the actual villains. The whole thing was a giant mess and felt like a big ego
project for Bores.
Several formers fans hated
how long it took for him to finish this arc, with many of them just throwing
their hands up and declaring they’re done with him. I can’t blame them.
Chris even had the gall to release it on DVD. Including
all the copyrighted Power Rangers footage. He’s lucky he’s such a nobody or
else Saban would have ended him.
The storyline established that Chris is a terrible writer
in reviews, characters, and storytelling. Imagine if The Dark Chapters ever got
off the ground? Hoo boy.
Rigged Contests
Throughout the early 2010s, Chris would put out several
small videos giving away free items as “contests”. It was so simple, just write
“Pick Me” in the comments and be subscribed. But also make sure to KISS HIS
FEET! People were quick to find out that Chris only picked the most defensive
of fans, including 12-year-old Johnny Awesome, who ended up winning twice! Shortly
after this came out, Chris would stop doing giveaways and never really give
stuff to his fans again. This is what you get for not being impartial.
The Skylanders Obsession
Remember Toys to Life games? Where you purchase a real
toy and be able to place it inside the video game to play with them? That was a
neat idea. Too bad Activision was Activision, and everything else was too
expensive.
Chris unwittingly struck gold when he uploaded a video
about Skylanders: Spyro’s Adventure, gathering many views for his couple hours
of work. He further struck gold when he uploaded a checklist video going over
the announced Skylanders: Giants figures and gained a massive number of views. It
was then that Chris found a new calling. Soon a deluge of Skylanders content
hit the channel, gaining him a new following, but alienating a lot of older
fans. His Skylanders videos even overtook his regular Irate Gamer work, to
which Chris told people asking for that “Too bad, my Skylanders videos are
popular, deal with it”. He did attempt to compromise by opening “TheSkylanderC”,
a side-channel dedicated solely to his Skylanders content. For whatever reason,
Chris gave up on it and just continued pumping out crap onto his main channel.
He even did a stop-motion video in celebration of the third game, Swap Force.
Things would eventually slow down, and then come to halt.
Partly for a reason we’ll get to later, but mostly for Activision pulling the
plug on the series and going for more traditional revivals like Crash The N Sane
Trilogy and Spyro The Reignited Trilogy. Greed overtook Skylanders much like it
overtook Guitar Hero, while Disney Infinity suffered from kids preferring games
their older siblings would play and Lego Dimensions was just too damn
expensive.
Either way, his Skylander obsession left a massive scar
on his channel that likely prevented any further growth.
A Stolen Sonic Generations Review
As noted above, Irate Gamer Neo was a lazy lazy series.
With Chris barely playing the game before “reviewing it”. In the case of this
episode, he didn’t even play the game. In his video on Sonic Generations, Chris
gushed about the game, yet made some weird complaints. Like how you can’t skip
cutscenes, even though you can. Then eagle-eyed viewers played the video in HD
and noticed something odd. A watermark in the corner for Cyberman65, a YouTuber
that does silent playthrough videos. Everyone soon realized that Chris stole
all the footage from Cyberman65 and passed off a review without playing the
game. In a professional place, Chris would have been fired and blacklisted like
Filip Miucin. But GotGame was basically a shack in the middle of the woods that
nobody noticed, so all they did was credit Cyberman while Chris’ “mother” went
around saying that Cyberman65 gave permission. That was likely a lie as Chris
never posted the video to YouTube, and now it only exists through DailyMotion
thanks to Igarchiver (since Blip shut down).
Chris didn’t learn his lesson, as many years later he
would repeat this move on a certain other channel when talking about Crash Team
Racing Nitro-Fueled. Stealing footage from MKIceAndFire and passing it off as
his own. It’s amazing how shameless he is.
Kickstarters are Stupid! Until they’re not…
Around 2011, James Rolfe would open an IndieGoGo campaign
to help produce the Angry Video Game Nerd feature film. Though highly
successful, going 433% over his target goal, it attracted some criticism from
people that have no idea how movies are funded. This only got worse when James helped
promote a separate Kickstarter for a “fixed” version of the infamous NES title
Cheetahmen II. People came out of the woodwork to call James a scam artist and
a fraud. Including Chris Bores!
Yes, seeing a moment of weakness in the man he stole
from, he took the opportunity to pounce and put out a poorly made video mocking
the Cheetahmen campaign video while calling Kickstarters “scams”. This got a
bunch of people to start praising him, including some of his harshest critics.
Though most people saw how slimy and petty Chris was acting.
And like most slimeballs, his views didn’t stay consistent.
Over the years he would promote and praise various other crowdfunding campaigns
without a single hint of irony. I bet if you showed the two viewpoints side by
side, he would scream “CONSPIRACY AND FAKE NEWS”. Yeah, he’s that type of person.
Irate Gamer Tries to Blog
The Irate Gamer site was never anything important.
Updates about the show were rare, you got a bunch of terrible fan art, but
there was never really anything to keep people coming back. Until 2013, when
Chris tried his hand at blogging. It blew.
Old video game news was frequent, often weeks after it
broke. But that was nothing compared to “Chris finds random nerdy thing and
talks about it”. Like Star Wars soap. Who doesn’t want to hear about Star Wars
soap? The answer is nobody.
He tried guest writers, but that didn’t last long. Anyone
that wrote for him able to tell me if he paid you? I want to know if he was
willing to do that or if he was one of those “for exposure” assholes.
And much like his reviews and footage from others, he plagiarized
others. Though that wasn’t until the end when he basically gave up. Now there’s
no more Irate Gamer website. But hey, you could buy it for nearly $1400. Cool?
The Return of Ghosts (including Ghost Hunting 2.0)
Before becoming the Irate Gamer, Chris started on YouTube
as a ghost hunter for his TV show “Haunted Investigators”. A boring slog of a
show featuring Buddhist priest Alan Cicco (apparently pronounced Sisko like the
Star Trek DS9 captain) and his former girlfriend Jennifer Schippel. Only six
episodes were produced but he wanted it to be a big deal as he made DVDs and I
imagine shopped it around to TV studios. Clearly that didn’t pan out, even
mentioning in his (now deleted) 200th video that ghosts just weren’t
doing it.
Until he decided to go back into it. Out of nowhere, he
revived his interest in ghosts and with it inflated his ego by calling himself
a “Ghost Behaviorist”. Filming a pilot for a new show called Pursuit of the
Paranormal and emptying his bank account to try and sell it to a TV studio.
Nobody bought it. Instead he screened it in a small theater in Ohio and put out
a DVD. Nobody cared.
You would think that would be the end of it but nope!
Chris is persistent in his stupid “findings”. So, the next major step was to
write a book. Calling it Ghost Hunting 2.0 (after Grant Wilson’s Ghost Hunting
because he’s totally the next step you guys) and self-publishing it on Amazon.
It was an abysmal book by all accounts. It was poorly written, badly structured,
and only served as a way for Chris to suck his own balls. Even downright saying
he created a new branch of psychology (spoiler alert: he didn’t)
He did everything to get noticed. He bought fake reviews,
he spammed people on Twitter when his book was free on Kindle Unlimited, he even
said his book was “the most controversial ghost hunting book ever made”. Citation
needed on that.
Chris claimed he had enough to write a second book, but
several years later nothing has come of that. I doubt he has any material for
that.
Nowadays the extent of Chris’ ghost obsession is to yell
and scream about the current ghost hunting shows on TV and claim that his work
was stolen by them. Without providing examples. But he did say he’ll make
videos about it starting this year. Grab the popcorn.
The Irate Gamer Game scam
We’ve established that Chris is lazy and quite dumb, but
it also turns out he’s gullible as hell. As is the case with the Irate Gamer
Game. Chris advertised that the game was coming for years, showing concept art sometimes.
It finally saw release in 2013 as a crappy iOS mobile game. It only existed for
three months before getting pulled for low quality. Turns out the whole thing
was a lazy reskin of another mobile game called Commander Cool. Hmm, lazy rehash
of something more popular? No, I don’t know anything like that.
At the very least, Chris did admit he got played like a
chump. So that’s something?
Suicide victims burn in Hell!
This… is awkward to talk about.
In early 2014, Justin “JewWario” Carmical took his own
life. He was a beloved content creator and the internet was shocked by his
sudden suicide. Chris on the other hand, never having heard of him, responded
to the news with “He will suffer in the afterlife as the universe doesn’t take kindly
to suicide”. Yeah, real insensitive remarks from him.
Turns out hindsight is a huge bitch. In 2018, when Channel
Awesome was being torn down by disgruntled employees for what they perceived as
“unfair treatment”, it was accidentally revealed that Carmical was a predator
that targeted underage girls. Something that only the higher-ups at Channel
Awesome knew and they covered it up. Yeah…
Does that vindicate Chris? No not at all. If anything,
this just reveals Chris’ terrible mindset about suicide, that their spirits
will suffer. It’s a real dark and unkind mindset to have, especially to the
countless suicide victims that clearly needed help for legitimate mental
problems.
But if there’s anything I learned the last few years, it’s
that there’s a lot of cruel people incapable of empathy.
“It’s not my fault! It’s James Rolfe’s fault! And
everyone else!”
October 2014, months after finishing his storyline while
still in the middle of the Skylanders deluge, Chris posted a 39-minute rambling
vlog going over his “career”. Most of it amounted to “It’s James Rolfe’s fault
that my YouTube career has failed! He undermined me! No, I won’t show evidence”.
It was a whiny stupid video of a desperate man clinging onto some relevance in
the hopes of getting viewers back, all while bashing someone far more popular than him. It kind of worked… until they went away again due to his own
incompetence.
Then it turns out this victim complex decided to stick
around, as over the years he would start blaming others quite a bit. He blamed
YouTube for several aspects, he blamed Machinima for “undermining him” too, he
also blames “the ghost hunting elite” for hiding his work and taking down his
website. Please tell me “elite” isn’t a dog whistle for Jews this time.
Seems really easy to play the victim these days. Who’s
next on the blame game?
2015 Explosion of Content
After a few more quiet months following his “opening up”
video, Chris made a big comeback March 2015. He started having a set schedule
of three videos a week and even released regular Irate Gamer videos (kind of).
People suspect this is due to him joining a new Multi-Channel Network and had a
set requirement for how he gets paid. In this case, three videos a week. However,
what Chris provided was pretty… lame. Enjoy videos like Chris explaining a GI
Joe reference, Chris talking about his greenscreen, Chris reviewing a website,
opening a LootCrate, and Chris’ attempts at Let’s Plays… they really sucked.
Chris also took this opportunity to experiment new
styles. They didn’t work at all. They were his “crazy reviews”, where Chris
decided to act like a total loon when talking about Splatoon and some movies.
With sped-up voices, way more slapstick, and… just baffling ideas. People hated
them!
His regular Irate Gamer reviews also took a major hit. He
decided to focus solely on beloved NES classics, and bash them for stupid reasons.
People hated these videos too! Chris just couldn’t win with his new ideas. All those new "fans" he made from the Opening Up video? Jumped ship so fast.
There was a super-secret project Chris was working on,
but we’ll get to that later.
The Whimpering End of History of Video Games
Though History of Video Games began in 2009, most of its
episodes were in this decade. Including remakes of the first three… for some
reason. A large number of them were released during his 2015 boom.
However, this series was nothing but failure after
failure. The facts were inaccurate or downright wrong, the attempts at humor
were terrible (even by his standards), the whole series was a mistake from
someone that tried so hard to prove he was legit, only to prove he didn’t have
a clue. That’s not even getting into how Ralph Baer chewed him out for
inaccuracy (though that took place before the decade).
At one point, Chris referred to this series as his “opus”.
Seems egotistical considering his so called “masterpiece” ended on the Intellivision
in 2015. Six years of videos and he only got to 1982. That’s a pretty weak opus.
Unlikely to continue considering all the circumstances too. I doubt he even has
all these old consoles now.
PLACE AD HERE! (not an offer, just a title)
Around the end of 2015, Chris seemingly ran out of ideas
and just posted video after video shilling crappy tech and mobile apps. The man
seemed like a billboard that would promote whatever Chinese garbage you threw
his way. He did manage to squeeze out one last Irate Gamer video in 2016 with
Duck Hunt, but then it was shilling shilling shilling. Before silence.
What did Chris need all that money for? What could he
have possibly been doing? Well…
The Rise (and Fall?) of Puppet Steve
During the Summer of 2015, around the time Chris
announced he would be reducing his output on the main channel (claiming “family
reasons”), he secretly started a side-channel intended for children. A low
budget “remake” of the old educational puppet show The Letter People with his
own set of “updated” puppets. His output was slow, only releasing a few videos likely
due to low numbers. He spent that time looking at what kids liked on YouTube,
and realized they really liked toy unboxings. This led to him starting another
side-channel, this one he would have two of his puppets (Marty and Muffin) unboxing
toys. However, only two episodes happened before he would bring in the new permanent
host. The spawn of Shoggath itself, Puppet Steve. Based on the default player
avatar in Minecraft, Puppet Steve would excitedly unbox toys while shouting “SUPER
COOL” at kids and wave the toys around like they were shiny keys. His early
videos had him try all sorts of things. “Crazy movie reviews” (even kids hated
those too as he never did them again), trailer reactions (he brought those
back, but for some reason started with the R-Rated Sausage Party) before settling
on toys toys and more toys. He soon found his golden goose in the form of Five
Nights at Freddy’s. Turns out kids really love that series, and they flocked to
his videos like vultures to a carcass. He also made Puppet Steve his new home
for Skylanders content… for the one year it had left before Activision pulled
the plug.
Surprisingly, Puppet Steve ended up being a success. His
subscriber count skyrocketed past his Irate Gamer count as more and more kids
laid their eyes on his poorly shot puppet show. It got him access to ToyFair,
and people donated him stuff to review, on top of all the stuff he had to buy.
Maybe that’s why he sold his ass out on Irate Gamer? To pay for all the toys on
Puppet Steve. What could go wrong at this point?
Well, views are way down. As of this writing, his latest
video on Series 12 of the Minecraft Mini Figures line only has 18k views after
three days. That’s not good considering he has over 630k subscribers now. Maybe
every video being over 10 minutes long has something to do with it? He’s not exciting
to listen to, especially since he ne longer uses a “funny voice”, just his
normal one. Yet he calls himself “a kid” …
With YouTube’s new policies in cooperation with the FTC
after violating COPPA, Puppet Steve doesn’t have much of a future either as
kids content will be curated hard, and won’t earn as much money. But hey, at
least he always has eBay. … PFFFFFFFT
Weirdly enough, Chris spent over a year denying he was
Puppet Steve. Blocking people on Facebook that brought it up. Eventually he
turned around about it… kind of. He’ll mention it, but he doesn’t want to talk
about it. That started happening around the time this did.
The Failed Revival
March 2018, out of nowhere, Chris announced that the
Irate Gamer was coming back. Except not really. Instead it would be the all new
“Chris Neo” show. An immensely scaled down Irate Gamer with none of the
slapstick, the cursing, the characters, or anything his stupid fans actually
liked. Instead, have an over-sized pair of neon glasses! … No?
Chris Neo was Chris at his most boring. Talking about
Sewer Shark and Deadly Towers but without any enthusiasm. It was a more
effective sleep-aide than previous doses of Borian.
Of course, if it was just that, it might have stood a
chance. But no, Chris decided “how about four fucking videos about Mario Game Genie!”
Nobody liked that. He also tried to cash-in on Avengers Infinity War by making
a video where Thanos wiped out people in video games. It was dumb and didn’t catch
on. Chris posted one last video about Arcade 1Up before vanishing again. Barely
seven months. Not even enough for a baby.
Needless to say, this comeback was a massive failure.
People wanted Irate Gamer, they didn’t want “Stupid glasses guy dully talks
about video games”, they wanted “stupid guy falls over playing video games”.
For some reason. Surely Chris Neo’s failure would convince him to bring back
Irate Gamer right? NOPE!
Podcasts: The Final Desperate Move
During Summer 2019, Chris was asking about podcasts. How
strange. Then he mentioned that he’s going to do a podcast. Yeah sure, I’m sure
it will work out just as well as all your other failed proj- it happened.
August 23rd, 2019 on Podbean.com, we got GeekTime The Next
Generation.
Named after a defunct podcast that I can’t find any information
on (if someone would be kind enough to inform me, please do), Chris is joined
by his friend Tim Walker as they talk about geeky things. The reason it exists
is that Chris is tired of “geeky podcasts” that go off-topic. Like how dare
Kevin Smith talk about his life-saving weight loss, he needs to talk about the
new Star Wars trailer! Yeah, that’s basically what he said. Chris is a dick.
The important thing about doing a podcast is having charisma.
Neither Chris or Tim have it, and they’re very boring to listen to. We also get
instances where Tim talks about a movie, but Chris doesn’t because he hasn’t
seen it. You know, it’s kind of important for your podcast to both be informed.
It’s also a venue for Chris to show just how ignorant of
video games he truly is. “BurgerTime chef should be in Smash Bros over Terry Bogard”
“Why do we need a Playstation 5?” “Final Fantasy VII remake is behind a paywall”.
At least he admits he’s casual, why he couldn’t do that years ago is anyone’s
guess.
Either way, six episodes of boring dreck. Will there be
more?
Wow, I wrote way more than I thought. A lot of this I condensed
into a single segment, like all the ghost stuff in one part and the storyline in
one part. If there’s anything you think I overlooked, let me know.
What will 2020 and beyond bring? The unemployment line.
Joking aside, I look forward to his incoherent rants about modern ghost hunting
shows and how they all “steal” from him.
Will Chris realize that people want Irate Gamer? Probably
not.
Will he give up on GeekTime? Most likely.
Thank you reading everyone.
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