*clap clap clap* Bravo Chris. You have found another way to be as lazy as possible with your videos. I am stunned, absolutely stunned at the lack of effort.
Remember IG’s 3-in-1 video? Yeah, that heinous excuse of a video where he only played an hour of each game, showed a severe lack of Tekken knowledge, and even after three years still didn’t know Turtles in Time was an Arcade game. Well, he’s doing it again! This time he’s making a “new series” out of it. It’s like he hears the problems people have with his videos, and instead of trying to improve on them he only makes them worse.
Ugh, so here’s “Video Game Roundup”, or is it “Video Game Rundown”? He calls it “Roundup” in the video but the title card says “Rundown”. That’s a good sign, he can’t even get the title to his own series right!
0:02 - 0:15: So why is IG doing something this half-assed? As usual, he claims he gets a “ton of requests” to review new games. The same reason he gave for the 3-in-1 video. Look, if you did get requests (which I highly doubt you do) then you need to honor them. You can’t just get them out of the way and expect people to be happy. You need to dedicate time and effort into giving the people what they want. On the other end, you can choose NOT to do certain requests. It’s that simple. But screw logic, Chris needs his Blip muneez!
0:16 - 0:42: The first game is Green Lantern: Rise of the Manhunters. Why did he hold up the box then put up an image of the cover off to the side? We’re not blind, we can see the box just fine.
He says he found the movie lackluster but finds the game pretty solid. Say, here’s another bit of laziness. All the movies on Chris’ Top 10 Summer Movies list have come out now, and he didn’t review a single one. What was the point of even making the list? Off-topic I know but this is a really short video.
“Now I haven’t played this game for too long yet…” And this is exactly what I’m talking about. You only talked about this to get the “request” out of the way, not even bothering to play through the entire game! I have a feeling he didn’t get past the first level…
“The further I advance in the game, the more attack power-ups I unlock” No shit Sherlock, you progress through the game you get stronger! Since you have a such a massive hard-on for God of War, this style should be familiar. I’m convinced, he only played this for an hour.
0:43 - 1:03: Game #2 is Lego Star Wars III: The Clone Wars.
He asks if this game offers anything new that we haven’t seen before, he says “they do a lot”. Okay, like what? What does this game offer that I haven’t seen in the first two Lego Star Wars, or Lego Batman, or Lego Harry Potter?
“There’s a lot of new offerings to keep you occupied and I just had a lot of fun…… with this title.” So you liked the game, can you tell me why? I want to know what “new offerings” there are. Guess what, he doesn’t fucking tell us. He just moves on to the next game. This is poor reviewing! Even if it’s not a serious review, you have to have depth! You can’t just say two lines and expect people to buy that! Especially something as vague as “it has new stuff!”
By the way, does Bores sound really awkward in this video? There’s a lot more pauses than usual.
1:04 - 1:46: Game #3 is Spider-Man: Shattered Dimensions. He acknowledges that this came out “some time ago”. He’s correct, it came out last year! It’s sad when the most recent game in this video is Green Lantern. Lego Star Wars III came out in March, and the fourth game came out in February.
“Now this game has upsides, and it has downsides” … He wrote that. He put that into his script, recorded it, and put it into his video. How does he have fans? How the fuck does anyone find this legit? I’m calling it, this is one of the worst videos he’s ever done. No thought, no effort, no care, no consideration, just pure laziness. You should be ashamed Chris Bores, GotGame should punish you for releasing something so poorly made.
*sigh* So, what does he say about the game. He felt it was repetitive, he didn’t like the camera angles (oh hey, he actually showed an example), and he felt Ultimate Spider-Man wasn’t unique enough.
He then proceeds to gush about the Noir Spider-Man stages because they use stealth, wanting an entire game of just Noir Spidey. Wow, if you loved that then Metal Gear Solid, Tenchu, Splinter Cell, Sly Cooper, Syphon Filter, Thief and Assassin’s Creed will blow your mind. Yeah, I can tell Bores has never played a stealth game.
EDIT: And Arkham Asylum, which the Noir segments shamelessly copied. Thanks to Deliverance115 for reminding me.
1:47 - 2:17: The final game is Mario Sports Mix. He found the game terrible.
“This game gets very very repetitive” Like every other sports game ever?
“I can’t believe Nintendo would release such an under polished game” So are you going to tell us what you mean by that? Nope, he moves right onto unlockable characters. Why bother at this point?
“Don’t waste your money, and if you did then I feel for you man” It’s too late to try relating to the audience, you’ve lost all your chances.
And the video ends with him signing off, saying there will be more in the future. NO! No more! I am just baffled that he did this. Does he think this is good? What’s worse is that there’s someone in the GotGame comments that praised it. Are standards that fucking low? Are people so willing to take a bunch of short, poorly-written, and vague game reviews and accept it as quality. I fear for the future everyone.
This wasn’t even a joke review like “X in 5 Seconds” or “50 Games in 3 minutes”, he wanted people to take this seriously. This is why YouTube and GotGame are his only safe havens, outside of those two sites everyone considers him a total fool. *sighs* That’s all for now everyone.