Are you guys doing okay? Hanging in there?
There’s a new video up and it’s a BIG one. But first, I want to talk about the video released last week.
Bores talks about coffee table books about the NES. Basically, a bunch of big books that provide information on the system’s library. I was going to make a post, but I didn’t feel like it.
It’s basically an excuse to talk about a group of books a friend of his wrote, and how he wrote an article in the second volume. These books do not look that impressive.
He brings up Pat Contri’s book but has a couple of odd criticisms. Like how he says it’s “too big” and should be in volumes like his friend’s books (probably thinks he can juice more money out of it) and he claims Pat missed a few games. What games? He doesn’t say!
Chris also says that the “Ultimate History of Video Games” was sooo helpful with his own history series, claiming he read the book 50 times. Yet somehow you still got so much wrong.
At one point, he says that if he had these books as a kid, he would have been a “pig in heaven”. … What the hell does that mean?
The dumbest statement by far is his claim that when he was starting out with Irate Gamer, a lot of this info was very hard to find. That is absolute bullshit. What about MobyGames? GameFAQs? VGMuseum? They all existed in 2007. And I know Chris knows about VGMuseum, the screenshots of the alternate Aladdin ending he showed were from that site. He didn’t capture them himself.
The comments provide some … interesting insight. In one, Chris claims to prefer the “visual aspect”. Then you don’t want a book Chris, you want a magazine.
A lot of the comments were shitting on Pat Contri. Seems unneeded. But also some comments were claiming Chris is now the “new AVGN”. Excuse me what? I know AVGN has gone down in quality (partly COVID partly Screenwave) but do not start suddenly claiming that this idiot is a “better replacement”.
Then it hit me. I know what the majority of Chris’ fans are. They are not gaming enthusiasts interested in retro titles (otherwise they would know Chris is full of it), they’re not people looking for comedy (because Chris isn’t funny), most of his fans are drama whores. People that seek out drama and go into YouTube comments to shit on others. The people that subscribe to Keemstar and go out and attack anyone he bitches about. These are people far more interested in stirring up shit than actual content. Chris likely knows this and allows it because it gives the veil of people actually watching him.
Anyway, the new video.
Chris has really hyped this one up, claiming it’s just like his 2008 videos. So, it will be utter nonsense and full of poor information?
The subject this time? Godzilla vs Kong, in celebration of the upcoming movie. So basically, Godzilla and King Kong games. Mostly Godzilla because there’s not a lot of King Kong games (and no Donkey Kong doesn’t count).
It’s a whopping 22 minutes and 38 seconds, might want to get something strong to drink.
The video opens with IG… playing with his toys. Hoo boy…
He goes on how it’s a momentous occasion, how monster fans have wanted this and it’s finally happening. Except it did happen already, in 1962 with King Kong vs Godzilla. Produced by Toho and is the third official Godzilla film. What fans were waiting for was a modern interpretation.
He’s going to pit the games against each other, holding up copies of Godzilla: Monster of Monsters on NES and King Kong 2: Ikari no Megaton Punch on Famicom. Yes, an actual Famicom cartridge. There’s a good chance it’s a bootleg.
Theme song.
We return to copyrighted footage! Paging Toho. IG then starts talking about how he watched Godzilla movies a lot when he was a kid, how they ran on TBS after the Saturday morning cartoons, he didn’t care they were low budget or in black & white or poorly dubbed. He lists off various notable kaiju Goji fought, even mentioning the original King Kong vs Godzilla. Okay, so he does know about it. Weird to say “finally” in in that opening.
He specifically points out Mecha Godzilla as “really silly”. If what I hear about GvK is true, then I don’t think Chris will like it.
With so many movies, it would only be “a matter of time” until the king found his way on the NES. Which he demonstrates with a Godzilla toy looking at his console. Why does Chris feel so immature at times?
He points out how Godzilla got two NES games in North America while King Kong got zero and takes out a chalkboard to show how this is a “competition” by putting a tally under Godzilla. What’s the point? Godzilla wins by virtue of having way more games. Sure only a few are decent, but at least they exist.
“If we judge a book by it’s cover by looking at the cover art here” You could have said that a lot differently. Anyway, he thinks Monster of Monsters is going to be great because of the cover art. Whatever…
He puts the cartridge inside and holy shit there’s a jump cut! Did Chris poorly splice two different takes of this? How do you mess up something this basic?! It's not even plugged in!
He starts up and gets upset that it looks like a board game (constantly bringing up Checkers). Angry that they wrapped a “turd” in a shiny package (the cartridge) and flashy intro. Boy, he’s really obsessed with intros isn’t he? Honestly, this game isn’t even that bad. There are better Goji games for sure, but it could be worse.
He goes over the story and gets mad that Godzilla is out in space because he wants to be in the city. You said earlier you watched the movies right? Planet X is from the sixth movie Invasion of Astro-Monster. Godzilla fights in space. There’s nothing wrong with that idea.
A dumb “Uranus” joke… yep
He points out either an enemy or background element and claims it rips off Mother Brain from Metroid. That’s actually Matango, from the movie of the same name. Another Toho created kaiju that was later brought into the Godzilla universe.
He’s surprised that Mothra is the sidekick. Why?
He starts going on about how the controls on the board part are “really bad” because he thought you could only move up and down, but then learned you can move right but pushing diagonally. Because apparently Chris has never considered that D-Pads can go diagonal.
He goes on and on about the board and how confusing it is and how at one point he accidentally forfeits a turn (with Price is Right fail horn, seriously did Chris pick this up from 2006?). We’re over five minutes in and he hasn’t gotten to the actual game part.
He finally starts playing with Mothra, and notes how she plays like “crystalized diarrhea” because every time you get hit, you get sent back. During this, we got a shot of him mashing his controller. Holy shit, you still can’t get this right?!
“This moth is as big as a plane!” Is that a line from the movies? Or did he try to quote The Giant Claw but got the line wrong. Also more unhinging his jaw.
He goes into how Mothra sucks, saying she’s not just shit, she’s “triple shit between two Double Stuf Oreos also filled with shit”. Aaah I think I see what he means by 2008 feel, bringing back the food analogies! I did not miss these.
He gets Mothra into a fight with Gezora resulting in a long sequence where he can’t move and Gezora stomps on him. Is he not losing health? Is he using Game Genie? Eventually the timer runs out and Mothra doesn’t die. He adds a holy light and choir because…. Pffff
Then he starts playing as Godzilla, and he’s all “Now dat’s what I’m talking about!” Going over how he’s so much better and takes out the bosses really easily. He wonders why he’s so good but Mothra is so shit. Then he says, “Didn’t anyone even playtest this game before releasing it?” It’s official, Chris has become a parody of himself. I miss Irate Gamer parodies…
He also make a comment about the Nintendo Seal of Quality. He does realize that just means “You paid us the fee, you can release the game” right? Though it just leads to a bad joke about “sealing” someone’s ass shut.
He dies at some point so he could shit on Mothra some more
He then claims there’s seven levels. Actually, there’s eight levels. Planet X is the last one.
Then there’s a weird bit where he brings up YouTube playthroughs and notes how one of them is four hours long. With his patented green circle of obvious on the video time. Going into a rant about how the developers wanted him to play for four hours. Did you somehow miss the other playthrough that’s only three hours? I think kids would have loved a longer NES game at the time. So many of them are actually really short once you get good. A no-death Castlevania run will net you about 20 minutes.
This just seems like a weird complaint.
He basically skips over the rest of the game, which I figure is just footage taken from YouTube. Mostly due to Godzilla using his atomic breath in one clip when IG didn’t use it at all.
Then he shows of a debug level when you type in the password GH1D0RA. Kay…
After he’s done, we get long bit where he rants about the old Nintendo Power article promoting the game. Okay why?
He scoffs at the multiple planets, still mad that it’s Godzilla in space. Then he looks at the review score and saw they gave it a 4/5. He gets mad and says this game deserves “Two turds in a barrel”, which he shows with the iPhone poo emoji and the Donkey Kong barrel, followed by a pointless use of “Toasty!” What the fuck was that Chris? What was the point of that? What’s the point of any of this?
He throws Monster of Monsters away and moves on to Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters. He once again praises the cover art and thinks it will be good because of it (stop). Also, a pointless Godzilla roar.
He likes the intro and the title screen, but then gets to the game and gets mad because it’s a “piece of shit strategy game”. He claims he always hated these and lists off all the NES strategy games he read off Wikipedia (Rampart, North & South which he mistakenly calls North VS South, and Romance of the Three Kingdoms) and calls them a “shit-tacular way to pass the fucking time”. Woooow, way to insult a beloved genre. Though, unlike Scott the Woz and his hate-boner for RPGs, nobody will care.
Then a comment about how each turn takes 10 minutes. Only if you suck.
This is followed by an anecdote with Zelda music playing. Apparently, his grandmother had an NES but only had two games, Super Mario Bros and Rampart. He hated it and said it was so bad it made him lose his mind. I don’t know this game personally, but is it that bad? I have my doubts. It sounds like Bores was too young or too stupid to get it. Wait, didn’t your grandmother have Punch-Out? You mentioned that back in your review in 2015. Either it was his other grandmother, or he’s lying. Leaning heavily on the latter.
Anyway, he plays and angrily explains how it works. When Godzilla one shots one of his units, it cuts to him going “This is supposed to be fun?” and when he says “fun” his jaw curves really hard. Is that supposed to be part of the joke? Look, I know that Godzilla 2 isn’t a good game, even for strategy fans. But maybe you shouldn’t have this giant bias towards it?
Then a random bit where he says this game is about as fun as “date night with John McClane on the 20 millionth floor”, followed by footage from Die Hard. … What? What building would have 20 million floors? Why even bring up Die Hard? Then he brags about it like “Yeah, how do you like that Die Hard reference?” Are you purposely insulting your audience now?
He then brings up how Godzilla 2 is costly on eBay, wondering how that happened. It’s probably a rare game, it did come out in 1992, NES games after 1991 tend to be rarer. Then he brings back the chalkboard to give Godzilla another point for having a “rare game”. What is your scoring system?
He moves on from Goji to Kong as he takes he starts with Atari, and more showing off his stupid toys. Nobody cares about your action figures Chris!
He notes how King Kong got an Atari game, but Godzilla didn’t and figured he wasn’t popular enough. No, he was. Instead of Atari, they focused more on computer games on MSX and Commodore 64. Plenty of Big G games made before the NES one.
He also notes the game has a blue cartridge, which gives a point to King Kong on the chalkboard. You didn’t put a lot of thought into this huh?
He starts playing and notices this is a complete clone of Donkey Kong. He seems to prefer it to the Atari port of DK until one of the bombs (which he calls a cupcake) goes up a ladder and kills him. Then he tosses it aside. Yeah, not much to say here, it’s just a weak Donkey Kong clone.
He notes how there was no King Kong on the NES in America, but there was a King Kong 2 in Japan. Which he’s so very clearly playing on an emulator since he’s looking at a fan translation. Come on, the game barely has any text, you can play this easily.
He says it’s actually pretty good. Then notes the title which he says translates out to “Ikari no Megaton Punch”. Wouldn’t a translation be “The Furious Megaton Punch”? All you did romanize the Japanese text. There’s a difference.
Lots of gushing about the game, says it’s really good blah blah blah. Gives a point to Kong on his chalkboard. He doesn’t know why it wasn’t ported (you mean localized?) Konami probably couldn’t get the rights in America, only in Japan.
More gushing… eventually he reaches the boss (a giant spider) and dies, making multiple comments about the spider eating Kong’s eyes. Was he trying to be funny?
Also, no mention that this was based on the 1986 movie King Kong Lives? It’s a rare tie-in licensed game that doesn’t suck.
On post-NES consoles, King Kong didn’t reappear until the 2005 on “Xbox”, as he shows the Xbox 360 version. It also showed up on the original Xbox, and the PS2, the Gamecube, PC, Game Boy Advance, PSP, DS, it was on a lot of things. Also, no note that it’s based on the Peter Jackson movie? It’s right there in the title.
As for Godzilla, plenty of games there. Like one on Game Boy where he’s all small and it’s kind of a 2D puzzle game. He doesn’t really say much about it. Then he looks at Godzilla: Kaijuu no Daishingeki for Sega Game Gear, and he’s mad because it’s another turn-based strategy game. He really seems to focus on the waiting aspect. Kind of weird he’s focusing on a Japan-only game though.
Same with the Playstation 1 Godzilla Trading Battle (another Japan only release), which upsets him because it’s a card game. So? Card games can fun. I don’t know if this one is because all you do is get upset that it’s “not the Godzilla game you want”. Wait… this seems familiar.
Also, you’re skipping a lot Godzilla games. What about that fighter on Super Famicom? It’s clear that you don’t care about these being Japan only for whatever reason.
He just wants something like Rampage but with Godzilla. That would be boring though, and you have Rampage. At least fighting games make sense.
More chalkboard nonsense.
Then he moves on to Super Godzilla on SNES. Says it’s weird and confusing, then pulls out a Nintendo Power magazine to show it agrees with him. Okay, people aren’t fond of this game, that’s not a new opinion. It’s slow and confusing.
Though he said Super Godzilla was the only SNES game, he actually does bring up Godzilla Kaijuu Daikessen which he says was going to be called “Monster War”. Actually, it was going to be called Destroy All Monsters. Monster War is just a localization of Kaijuu Daikessen.
Anyway, he says the game is great, but he mentions he always wanted a platformer. Wait, that’s what you wanted? I don’t think that would really work for Godzilla.
Then he gives the point back to Godzilla and they’re all tied. He goes back to the intro area (I don’t know the name of it) to have the sprites of the two monsters fight it out. It’s lame and he acknowledges it as such, hoping for something flashy. Oh no… it’s going to get worse isn’t it?
And it does! We get a stupid ending bit with… Mecha Irate Gamer. Oh dear lord… When he roars, his jaw does the same jutting thing Bores does so… points for that? But then when there’s a side view, it is REAL terrible. Like, how did you look at that animation and think “Perfect”.
At one point, one of his fireballs (ugggh) hits one of his cabinets and… does nothing. But I guess it made IG mad as he yells “My video game collection!” That’s not a collection! That’s just a bunch of replicas that you wasted money on.
He wonders where John McClane is (no Chris, that’s not a brick joke) when suddenly Bomberman shows up. What? He pulls out a bomb with a Zelda sound effect because Bores hates you, and he takes it. It looks like officially licensed merch, maybe he plans to use it for Puppet Steve? Or already used it?
Then he refers to Mecha IG as “You handsome Mecha Irate Gamer”. Gotta show his ego!
Then he throws it and blows him up easily. LAAAAAAME!
He asks how the Godzilla and Kong sprites are, and then claims he “proved the justice of our culture” Wait what? Then we get the ending screen to the NES Ghostbusters game. WHAT?! WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS?! WHY?! Holy shit that was so dumb!
We then get a special thanks to Eli Bruner who made the Mecha IG sprite. Look Eli, I’m sure you’re a good guy, but did you really look at the side-sprites and think that was completely okay? Don’t lower yourself to the standards of Bores.
Again, that was so fucking dumb. Terrible humor even by Bores’ standards, a cringy ending bit (huh, I guess that’s another reason it’s “like 2008”), poor reviews of the Godzilla games, really inconsistent in what he covered too. Why not bring up the sixth gen ones? Oh right, he doesn’t have those systems, and he probably can’t emulate PS2, Gamecube, or Xbox.
Maaaan, this hurt my brain so much. It’s incredible that he can reach all kinds of new levels of cringe. It’s almost like he’s doing this on purpose.
The light at the end of the tunnel draws near. Vaccinations are rolling out at a fast clip. Hopefully, we can all return to some normalcy.
There’s a new video up and it’s a BIG one. But first, I want to talk about the video released last week.
Bores talks about coffee table books about the NES. Basically, a bunch of big books that provide information on the system’s library. I was going to make a post, but I didn’t feel like it.
It’s basically an excuse to talk about a group of books a friend of his wrote, and how he wrote an article in the second volume. These books do not look that impressive.
He brings up Pat Contri’s book but has a couple of odd criticisms. Like how he says it’s “too big” and should be in volumes like his friend’s books (probably thinks he can juice more money out of it) and he claims Pat missed a few games. What games? He doesn’t say!
Chris also says that the “Ultimate History of Video Games” was sooo helpful with his own history series, claiming he read the book 50 times. Yet somehow you still got so much wrong.
At one point, he says that if he had these books as a kid, he would have been a “pig in heaven”. … What the hell does that mean?
The dumbest statement by far is his claim that when he was starting out with Irate Gamer, a lot of this info was very hard to find. That is absolute bullshit. What about MobyGames? GameFAQs? VGMuseum? They all existed in 2007. And I know Chris knows about VGMuseum, the screenshots of the alternate Aladdin ending he showed were from that site. He didn’t capture them himself.
The comments provide some … interesting insight. In one, Chris claims to prefer the “visual aspect”. Then you don’t want a book Chris, you want a magazine.
A lot of the comments were shitting on Pat Contri. Seems unneeded. But also some comments were claiming Chris is now the “new AVGN”. Excuse me what? I know AVGN has gone down in quality (partly COVID partly Screenwave) but do not start suddenly claiming that this idiot is a “better replacement”.
Then it hit me. I know what the majority of Chris’ fans are. They are not gaming enthusiasts interested in retro titles (otherwise they would know Chris is full of it), they’re not people looking for comedy (because Chris isn’t funny), most of his fans are drama whores. People that seek out drama and go into YouTube comments to shit on others. The people that subscribe to Keemstar and go out and attack anyone he bitches about. These are people far more interested in stirring up shit than actual content. Chris likely knows this and allows it because it gives the veil of people actually watching him.
Anyway, the new video.
Chris has really hyped this one up, claiming it’s just like his 2008 videos. So, it will be utter nonsense and full of poor information?
The subject this time? Godzilla vs Kong, in celebration of the upcoming movie. So basically, Godzilla and King Kong games. Mostly Godzilla because there’s not a lot of King Kong games (and no Donkey Kong doesn’t count).
It’s a whopping 22 minutes and 38 seconds, might want to get something strong to drink.
The video opens with IG… playing with his toys. Hoo boy…
He goes on how it’s a momentous occasion, how monster fans have wanted this and it’s finally happening. Except it did happen already, in 1962 with King Kong vs Godzilla. Produced by Toho and is the third official Godzilla film. What fans were waiting for was a modern interpretation.
He’s going to pit the games against each other, holding up copies of Godzilla: Monster of Monsters on NES and King Kong 2: Ikari no Megaton Punch on Famicom. Yes, an actual Famicom cartridge. There’s a good chance it’s a bootleg.
Theme song.
We return to copyrighted footage! Paging Toho. IG then starts talking about how he watched Godzilla movies a lot when he was a kid, how they ran on TBS after the Saturday morning cartoons, he didn’t care they were low budget or in black & white or poorly dubbed. He lists off various notable kaiju Goji fought, even mentioning the original King Kong vs Godzilla. Okay, so he does know about it. Weird to say “finally” in in that opening.
He specifically points out Mecha Godzilla as “really silly”. If what I hear about GvK is true, then I don’t think Chris will like it.
With so many movies, it would only be “a matter of time” until the king found his way on the NES. Which he demonstrates with a Godzilla toy looking at his console. Why does Chris feel so immature at times?
He points out how Godzilla got two NES games in North America while King Kong got zero and takes out a chalkboard to show how this is a “competition” by putting a tally under Godzilla. What’s the point? Godzilla wins by virtue of having way more games. Sure only a few are decent, but at least they exist.
“If we judge a book by it’s cover by looking at the cover art here” You could have said that a lot differently. Anyway, he thinks Monster of Monsters is going to be great because of the cover art. Whatever…
He puts the cartridge inside and holy shit there’s a jump cut! Did Chris poorly splice two different takes of this? How do you mess up something this basic?! It's not even plugged in!
He starts up and gets upset that it looks like a board game (constantly bringing up Checkers). Angry that they wrapped a “turd” in a shiny package (the cartridge) and flashy intro. Boy, he’s really obsessed with intros isn’t he? Honestly, this game isn’t even that bad. There are better Goji games for sure, but it could be worse.
He goes over the story and gets mad that Godzilla is out in space because he wants to be in the city. You said earlier you watched the movies right? Planet X is from the sixth movie Invasion of Astro-Monster. Godzilla fights in space. There’s nothing wrong with that idea.
A dumb “Uranus” joke… yep
He points out either an enemy or background element and claims it rips off Mother Brain from Metroid. That’s actually Matango, from the movie of the same name. Another Toho created kaiju that was later brought into the Godzilla universe.
He’s surprised that Mothra is the sidekick. Why?
He starts going on about how the controls on the board part are “really bad” because he thought you could only move up and down, but then learned you can move right but pushing diagonally. Because apparently Chris has never considered that D-Pads can go diagonal.
He goes on and on about the board and how confusing it is and how at one point he accidentally forfeits a turn (with Price is Right fail horn, seriously did Chris pick this up from 2006?). We’re over five minutes in and he hasn’t gotten to the actual game part.
He finally starts playing with Mothra, and notes how she plays like “crystalized diarrhea” because every time you get hit, you get sent back. During this, we got a shot of him mashing his controller. Holy shit, you still can’t get this right?!
“This moth is as big as a plane!” Is that a line from the movies? Or did he try to quote The Giant Claw but got the line wrong. Also more unhinging his jaw.
He goes into how Mothra sucks, saying she’s not just shit, she’s “triple shit between two Double Stuf Oreos also filled with shit”. Aaah I think I see what he means by 2008 feel, bringing back the food analogies! I did not miss these.
He gets Mothra into a fight with Gezora resulting in a long sequence where he can’t move and Gezora stomps on him. Is he not losing health? Is he using Game Genie? Eventually the timer runs out and Mothra doesn’t die. He adds a holy light and choir because…. Pffff
Then he starts playing as Godzilla, and he’s all “Now dat’s what I’m talking about!” Going over how he’s so much better and takes out the bosses really easily. He wonders why he’s so good but Mothra is so shit. Then he says, “Didn’t anyone even playtest this game before releasing it?” It’s official, Chris has become a parody of himself. I miss Irate Gamer parodies…
He also make a comment about the Nintendo Seal of Quality. He does realize that just means “You paid us the fee, you can release the game” right? Though it just leads to a bad joke about “sealing” someone’s ass shut.
He dies at some point so he could shit on Mothra some more
He then claims there’s seven levels. Actually, there’s eight levels. Planet X is the last one.
Then there’s a weird bit where he brings up YouTube playthroughs and notes how one of them is four hours long. With his patented green circle of obvious on the video time. Going into a rant about how the developers wanted him to play for four hours. Did you somehow miss the other playthrough that’s only three hours? I think kids would have loved a longer NES game at the time. So many of them are actually really short once you get good. A no-death Castlevania run will net you about 20 minutes.
This just seems like a weird complaint.
He basically skips over the rest of the game, which I figure is just footage taken from YouTube. Mostly due to Godzilla using his atomic breath in one clip when IG didn’t use it at all.
Then he shows of a debug level when you type in the password GH1D0RA. Kay…
After he’s done, we get long bit where he rants about the old Nintendo Power article promoting the game. Okay why?
He scoffs at the multiple planets, still mad that it’s Godzilla in space. Then he looks at the review score and saw they gave it a 4/5. He gets mad and says this game deserves “Two turds in a barrel”, which he shows with the iPhone poo emoji and the Donkey Kong barrel, followed by a pointless use of “Toasty!” What the fuck was that Chris? What was the point of that? What’s the point of any of this?
He throws Monster of Monsters away and moves on to Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters. He once again praises the cover art and thinks it will be good because of it (stop). Also, a pointless Godzilla roar.
He likes the intro and the title screen, but then gets to the game and gets mad because it’s a “piece of shit strategy game”. He claims he always hated these and lists off all the NES strategy games he read off Wikipedia (Rampart, North & South which he mistakenly calls North VS South, and Romance of the Three Kingdoms) and calls them a “shit-tacular way to pass the fucking time”. Woooow, way to insult a beloved genre. Though, unlike Scott the Woz and his hate-boner for RPGs, nobody will care.
Then a comment about how each turn takes 10 minutes. Only if you suck.
This is followed by an anecdote with Zelda music playing. Apparently, his grandmother had an NES but only had two games, Super Mario Bros and Rampart. He hated it and said it was so bad it made him lose his mind. I don’t know this game personally, but is it that bad? I have my doubts. It sounds like Bores was too young or too stupid to get it. Wait, didn’t your grandmother have Punch-Out? You mentioned that back in your review in 2015. Either it was his other grandmother, or he’s lying. Leaning heavily on the latter.
Anyway, he plays and angrily explains how it works. When Godzilla one shots one of his units, it cuts to him going “This is supposed to be fun?” and when he says “fun” his jaw curves really hard. Is that supposed to be part of the joke? Look, I know that Godzilla 2 isn’t a good game, even for strategy fans. But maybe you shouldn’t have this giant bias towards it?
Then a random bit where he says this game is about as fun as “date night with John McClane on the 20 millionth floor”, followed by footage from Die Hard. … What? What building would have 20 million floors? Why even bring up Die Hard? Then he brags about it like “Yeah, how do you like that Die Hard reference?” Are you purposely insulting your audience now?
He then brings up how Godzilla 2 is costly on eBay, wondering how that happened. It’s probably a rare game, it did come out in 1992, NES games after 1991 tend to be rarer. Then he brings back the chalkboard to give Godzilla another point for having a “rare game”. What is your scoring system?
He moves on from Goji to Kong as he takes he starts with Atari, and more showing off his stupid toys. Nobody cares about your action figures Chris!
He notes how King Kong got an Atari game, but Godzilla didn’t and figured he wasn’t popular enough. No, he was. Instead of Atari, they focused more on computer games on MSX and Commodore 64. Plenty of Big G games made before the NES one.
He also notes the game has a blue cartridge, which gives a point to King Kong on the chalkboard. You didn’t put a lot of thought into this huh?
He starts playing and notices this is a complete clone of Donkey Kong. He seems to prefer it to the Atari port of DK until one of the bombs (which he calls a cupcake) goes up a ladder and kills him. Then he tosses it aside. Yeah, not much to say here, it’s just a weak Donkey Kong clone.
He notes how there was no King Kong on the NES in America, but there was a King Kong 2 in Japan. Which he’s so very clearly playing on an emulator since he’s looking at a fan translation. Come on, the game barely has any text, you can play this easily.
He says it’s actually pretty good. Then notes the title which he says translates out to “Ikari no Megaton Punch”. Wouldn’t a translation be “The Furious Megaton Punch”? All you did romanize the Japanese text. There’s a difference.
Lots of gushing about the game, says it’s really good blah blah blah. Gives a point to Kong on his chalkboard. He doesn’t know why it wasn’t ported (you mean localized?) Konami probably couldn’t get the rights in America, only in Japan.
More gushing… eventually he reaches the boss (a giant spider) and dies, making multiple comments about the spider eating Kong’s eyes. Was he trying to be funny?
Also, no mention that this was based on the 1986 movie King Kong Lives? It’s a rare tie-in licensed game that doesn’t suck.
On post-NES consoles, King Kong didn’t reappear until the 2005 on “Xbox”, as he shows the Xbox 360 version. It also showed up on the original Xbox, and the PS2, the Gamecube, PC, Game Boy Advance, PSP, DS, it was on a lot of things. Also, no note that it’s based on the Peter Jackson movie? It’s right there in the title.
As for Godzilla, plenty of games there. Like one on Game Boy where he’s all small and it’s kind of a 2D puzzle game. He doesn’t really say much about it. Then he looks at Godzilla: Kaijuu no Daishingeki for Sega Game Gear, and he’s mad because it’s another turn-based strategy game. He really seems to focus on the waiting aspect. Kind of weird he’s focusing on a Japan-only game though.
Same with the Playstation 1 Godzilla Trading Battle (another Japan only release), which upsets him because it’s a card game. So? Card games can fun. I don’t know if this one is because all you do is get upset that it’s “not the Godzilla game you want”. Wait… this seems familiar.
Also, you’re skipping a lot Godzilla games. What about that fighter on Super Famicom? It’s clear that you don’t care about these being Japan only for whatever reason.
He just wants something like Rampage but with Godzilla. That would be boring though, and you have Rampage. At least fighting games make sense.
More chalkboard nonsense.
Then he moves on to Super Godzilla on SNES. Says it’s weird and confusing, then pulls out a Nintendo Power magazine to show it agrees with him. Okay, people aren’t fond of this game, that’s not a new opinion. It’s slow and confusing.
Though he said Super Godzilla was the only SNES game, he actually does bring up Godzilla Kaijuu Daikessen which he says was going to be called “Monster War”. Actually, it was going to be called Destroy All Monsters. Monster War is just a localization of Kaijuu Daikessen.
Anyway, he says the game is great, but he mentions he always wanted a platformer. Wait, that’s what you wanted? I don’t think that would really work for Godzilla.
Then he gives the point back to Godzilla and they’re all tied. He goes back to the intro area (I don’t know the name of it) to have the sprites of the two monsters fight it out. It’s lame and he acknowledges it as such, hoping for something flashy. Oh no… it’s going to get worse isn’t it?
And it does! We get a stupid ending bit with… Mecha Irate Gamer. Oh dear lord… When he roars, his jaw does the same jutting thing Bores does so… points for that? But then when there’s a side view, it is REAL terrible. Like, how did you look at that animation and think “Perfect”.
At one point, one of his fireballs (ugggh) hits one of his cabinets and… does nothing. But I guess it made IG mad as he yells “My video game collection!” That’s not a collection! That’s just a bunch of replicas that you wasted money on.
He wonders where John McClane is (no Chris, that’s not a brick joke) when suddenly Bomberman shows up. What? He pulls out a bomb with a Zelda sound effect because Bores hates you, and he takes it. It looks like officially licensed merch, maybe he plans to use it for Puppet Steve? Or already used it?
Then he refers to Mecha IG as “You handsome Mecha Irate Gamer”. Gotta show his ego!
Then he throws it and blows him up easily. LAAAAAAME!
He asks how the Godzilla and Kong sprites are, and then claims he “proved the justice of our culture” Wait what? Then we get the ending screen to the NES Ghostbusters game. WHAT?! WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS?! WHY?! Holy shit that was so dumb!
We then get a special thanks to Eli Bruner who made the Mecha IG sprite. Look Eli, I’m sure you’re a good guy, but did you really look at the side-sprites and think that was completely okay? Don’t lower yourself to the standards of Bores.
Again, that was so fucking dumb. Terrible humor even by Bores’ standards, a cringy ending bit (huh, I guess that’s another reason it’s “like 2008”), poor reviews of the Godzilla games, really inconsistent in what he covered too. Why not bring up the sixth gen ones? Oh right, he doesn’t have those systems, and he probably can’t emulate PS2, Gamecube, or Xbox.
Maaaan, this hurt my brain so much. It’s incredible that he can reach all kinds of new levels of cringe. It’s almost like he’s doing this on purpose.
The light at the end of the tunnel draws near. Vaccinations are rolling out at a fast clip. Hopefully, we can all return to some normalcy.
I thought the new AVGN episode was meh at best. The first part was good, but the second part is where it went downhill. If only Screenwave would actually rewrite their scripts, maybe a lot of people wouldn't hate them for ruining AVGN.
ReplyDeleteAVGN now is like how Paul McCartney was in the 80's, entirely off of the momentum of great videos he made years prior.
DeleteAVGN in the early 2020s is more like early 2000s Madonna. Just as 2010s AVGN was like 90s Madonna and 2000s AVGN was like 80s Madonna.
DeleteI hope that one day, when we do return to normalcy, and when Screenwave is no more, James can really go back to writing his own content for AVGN and make it great again. Honestly, I don't think the new episodes are "bad", per se, but they just aren't as great as his older material.
ReplyDeleteI agree.
DeleteHe brought up Motherbrain so maybe he's poking at us for wanting him to do Metroid. He knows we want him to. Even if he reviews it, he'll probably say "I get a lot of requests for this game."
ReplyDelete=== North & South which he mistakenly calls North VS South ===
ReplyDeleteIt's official - Bores must think that the ampersand means VS. - just like with "Mario VS. Sonic."
Also, the Mecha Irate Gamer is likely a ripoff of AVGN's Super Mecha Death Christ from his SMB3/Wizard review. Just because you and James are supposedly "friends" now doesn't give you carte blanche to keep ripping him off.
I said the same thing a year ago with his return and got blasted every day by fanboys. Turns out I was right.
DeleteI think what they meant by Chris being the new AVGN is that they're now like the current AVGN where the quality might be decreasing. Not sure though.
ReplyDeleteBut still, I feel that even James' "worst" episodes can be a lot better than Chris' "best" episodes.
DeleteI do wish James wrote more episodes himself, though, instead of Screenwave.
Calling it now, "Mecha Irate Gamer" is going to be the replacement for IG's ROB sidekick. Mecha Irate Gamer will come back from the dead mysteriously and switch sides just like ROB. Since Chris likely sold ROB, he's gotta find that replacement somehow.
ReplyDeleteWould explain the reuse of footage is his Robocop video. So what would be the new phrase? "Someone call the cops cause I just got Migged!"?
DeleteWhen Chris talked about the Godzilla game for Game Gear,he mistook the Godzilla tower from "Godzilla vs. Gigan" for Mechagodzilla.
ReplyDeleteSince we've talked about Game Grumps before on this blog, is anyone aware Dan Avidan might be a sexual predator?
ReplyDeleteThe majority of chris' fans are drama whores and go out of their way to find drama and shit on people? What does that make this blog dedicated to shitting on everything one guy does then? lol. Surely this whole blog is just looking for " Chris drama"?
ReplyDeleteAnyway, i think saying that all his fans are just drama whores is a bit of a stretch, maybe some of them get into the whole saying Chris is better than avgn now, because they are into the whole " exposing james rolfe"thing. Pretty much doing to him what you guys do to chris ( i disagree with that too). But i dunno, can you really say thats the majority of people, surely the whole thing is subjective, and people can just like his stuff and be a fan of his? Maybe people do think hes better than avgn now? Hardly matters if they think that, its just an opinion. I found his recent video to be a lot more fun than the avgn shrek one? Speaking personally, I dont find him side splittingly funny, but he makes silly videos, doesnt seem to take it too seriously, seems like he has fun making them, and theres a certain charm to that I enjoy. But like, whatever, if his videos annoy you and you dont like them, fine. Dont see why you take it all so seriously haha.
I can see your point but I do have a couple of disagreements. When someone says this blog is looking for drama, I have said on this blog before that Chris still makes videos and someone would still say something even without this blog. As for "he's gotten better" based on what I have seen on Gary Sargent's channel, the crossover, and this review, I think Chris is as stale as ever. Plus his gaming knowledge hasn't improved and still comes across as clueless on the subject (his other most common criticism).
DeleteAs for AVGN, I do believe some of the Screenwave era reviews aren't good but that is not on James' end and he still is a far better writer and actor than Chris in the ones James does have a say on.
As for Chris' fanboys, you don't go on the RantGrumpz subreddit and expect to say nice things about Arin Hanson without getting shat on. Same applies to James Rolfe and this blog.
Who's Gary Sargent?
DeleteSomeone I banned for spamming.
Delete@BatDanNight I have noticed that the wave of trolls from last year have vanished (including the most obnoxious one, Unknown). If they are banned then to quote Todd In The Shadows "GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE"
DeleteI dont really watch game grumps or know about them, so had to google, but yeah, I wouldnt agree with that subreddit either, I just dont really understand a blog were the whole purpose is to hate a guy, want him to fail, and watch everything they do and analyse everything they do despite not liking them? Ive seen some of the stuff on cinemassacre truth as well for example, think some of the things there can go too far as well. Only comment here because I used to get involved in the all the chris hate myself, and regret it. Surely it would be more enjoyable to put all this focus on something you like though?
ReplyDeleteI dont like when things get personal and people take all the hatred toofar, but Like im not saying not to discuss his videos, its all entertainment, of course people can think what they want about that, youre right people can still discuss it even without this blog. But dunno watching everything a guy you dont like does, and analysing everything in his videos, and beyond his videos, to his life, yeah its too far for me. and to this point, getting annoyed that other people like something you dont, and trying to justify it and not feel like people can like what they like, is another thing thats too far.
I agree he does have factual errors in his videos, although i do think its a lot less than his earlier stuff, but again, i dont think its really the worst thing in the world, i wouldnt really watch him or avgn to learn things, i think its more just them trying to show case their experiences with the games and make fun videos about it. Think chris is doing a better job at this these days personally, maybe before he might have marketed himself too much on the " i know the ins and outs of these games"thing which yeah, isnt really his strong point, hes trying to show a lot more how he related to them now, and throw in his goofy humour, which isnt for everything, but whatever, hes doing something he likes.
Same thing with James really, i agree, he still is a really good writer on things he has his say on, and I think hes good at showing how he relates to what hes talking about too, but yeah, i wouldnt really go to him if i wanted a lot of knowledge about games. Maybe I would listen to Mike as that really seems to be his thing. I would watch James for his film knowledge though, because he does just seem to be an encyclopaedia when it comes to movies.
The guy has been doing it for over 10 years, to say he's obsessed would be an understatement.
DeleteI seriously worry about some people's mental health here.
Have any of you watched SGB at all (SomeCallMeJohnny's gaming channel)? Johnny's brother Elliot has to be the worst Mario player of all time. Gets a Game Over in world 1-1, dies in a coin ship in Mario 3, dies in a Switch Palace in Mario World. Arin Hanson could probably play better than Elliot (but Elliot has Johnny yelling at him for his incompetence).
ReplyDeleteI mean. He was 16 and playing on camera. Arin is a grown man who can't pay attention to tutorials. Kind of a big difference
DeleteI don't think Elliot's age at the time vindicates how badly he played Mario. But Elliot improved overtime (also I LOVE SGB and was sad when Johnny announced they were disbanding).
DeleteFB Update:
ReplyDelete"Okay, so just wanted to give an update on all the great projects in store for the next few weeks. This summer is going to be amazing. I've got an irate gamer episode in the finishing stages, its sort of a past rehash but I feel it works well in this incarnation, then I've got an irate the 80's episode that I've wanted to do since 2016 but had to scrap it so I can't wait to get that off my bucket list. As for the season 2 episodes video, that's been delayed a bit. I've been using a very sophisticated software with many settings and I've spent many days doing trial and error tests in figuring out the best way to render out SD video without it looking weird, which happens if you enhance the hell out of it, but I've figured out the best setting is by upscaling to 1280x720 and laying it into a 1920x1080 project. So with that figured out, the episodes are slowly being upscaled. I've got 2 episodes being edited by my editors and about 3 or 4 different scripts being worked on too. THEN on top of that, I have some real top secret things I've been working on. One that might end up on TV. fingers crossed. Thanks for the support and love! Game on!"
Has anyone heard that DSP was caught doxxing someone on Discord? First Game Grumps doxxes someone that made a walkthrough and now this.
ReplyDeleteSo an Irate the 80s on the Kool Aid Man and AVGN on Darkman for the NES.
ReplyDeleteIncidentally has there ever been a time when both an AVGN and IG episode premiered on the same day.
so a new irate the 80s is up and it is on kool aid flavors and the history of them and it is boring
ReplyDeleteBack to the food topics, I see.
DeleteThey don't call him Chris Bores for nothing!
DeleteDidn't he do this back in 2010? What made him think bringing this back was a good idea? What's next, Rice Krispanese Revisited?!
DeleteKudos on tracking down and interviewing the guy who played Kool-Aid Man, but it's Bores, so he has to play a clip of the guy talking about when he was Ronald McDonald's stunt double. And matches Kool-Aid footage to that audio.
DeleteVrgzblpsntfgmrfbst.
Darkman (NES) - Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN)
ReplyDeleteDefinitely better than the Fairy Tale Freakdown review. Maybe James wrote the episode himself this time?
DeleteI also noticed less Screenwave input. Whenever James does a game post SNES, there is usually at least bits of Screenwave input (I can tell whether James wrote a joke or Screenwave did).
Deleteone of the worst parts of the video he does this kool aid baby bottle joke where i am not kidding he tries to drink out of the bottle and just names the flavors over and over
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy that this blog is back. It's kinda nostalgic to watch an Irate Gamer video and then come here to read why it sucks. Thanks for still doing this.
ReplyDelete