Another DVD already? Pay Money for Inaccurate History! Plus, New Painful Fan Art

Here's a thought Bores, maybe you should clear out all the unwanted DVDs you have already before adding more and more of them? Maybe hold more contests giving them away for free since most of your fans would probably have to steal their parents credit cards to get them.

As you can probably tell from the title, he put out another DVD. History of Video Games "The Silver Age". *sighs* Chris, you realize that the Silver Age would refer to the third generation right? NES, Master System, Atari 7800. The Golden Age would refer to the era of the Atari 2600, Intellivison and so on. What your DVD covers is even older than the Golden Age, I wouldn't know what to refer to it as the Ages of Man start at Golden. Though knowing him, he probably got the name from comic books.
So calling the era of Pong, Computer Space and the Fairchild Channel F the Silver Age is horribly inaccurate. Unless he confused "predecessor" and "successor" again. This wouldn't surprise me.

So, what's on the DVD?
Parts 1-5 (which is six videos when you remember Part 2 is in two parts... unless he merged it for the DVD). A horrid value if you ask me.
A 15 minute documentary, I imagine it's the same thing that I recapped nearly two years ago. http://irategamersucks.blogspot.com/2011/03/historically-bad-making-of-or-interview.html
Bloopers because WACKY (it's been a long time since he's put out a blooper reel on YouTube, I wonder if it's still the same "stopping in the middle of a line" nonsense).
 And deleted scenes, which I'm hoping were just stupid sketches and not actual history because leaving out history... boy what a hack.

I love how he advertises that it covers from 1961-1977, like that's a huge amount of time. Never mind that in the first video he went from '61 to '71. Sadly I'm sure someone will fall for this, like some Square-Enix fans fell for Final Fantasy: All the Bravest (look it up).

How much is Bores charging this time? Despite having less content than all his other DVDs, he prices it around the same, $15 dollars. Oh wait that's on sale, the regular price is $18 dollars. Double Fine's new game is out now, it's called The Cave, it's only $15 dollars on PSN, XBLA, Nintendo Network and PC. That is a better investment.
Hell, Wii U owners can get Balloon Fight for 30 cents right now. That's a better use of money.

You know, Bores has never capitalized on any of his possible catchphrases or characters. He never sold merch with them on it.
It's obvious Bores is doing all this for money, so where's the catchphrase shirts? The character shirts? Maybe a Wilson, I mean, Wilkins shirt, it's not like you'd get in trouble. ScrewAttack certainly didn't when they sold a shirt with Frog from Chrono Trigger on it and claimed it was a different character.
But no, just a generic ugly shirt with his logo on it.

Also, Bores updated his site to mention that his New Super Mario Bros. 2 review is out. Rather "The New Super Mario Bros 2". I'm beginning to think he's doing that on purpose just to annoy me.

That's all for now. I'm going to pour one out for THQ. They may have not been perfect, but Saints Row and Darksiders were all kinds of fun, and millions enjoyed their WWE titles.

EDIT: Oh look at that, a contest giving away the DVD. What a surprise.
In the video, he notes that he calls it the "Silver Age" because the "Golden Age" comes after it. You moron! That is not how that works! To put it another way, Golden Age comes first, Silver Age comes second, Bronze Age comes third. First, second, third place. How is that so hard?

He also added new fan art to his site. ... Joy. Hmmm, you know I think I can cover it here.
Oh man... Bores completely screwed the order now. He put his title cards in the fan art section now. Tell you what, I'll go by page number and picture to make things easier.

Page 4, Picture 10: Let's start off with a photoshop disaster. I hope you like shitty looking NES games. We get the cover, the back, and the cartridge.
The cover shows the title "The Irate Gamer Game". Say, remember that? How it got re-invented multiple times and never got anywhere outside of concept art? I suspect that those people were scam artists. The picture is Bores in front of fire, because his fans are just as unoriginal as he is.
The back cover contains a story description that I can barely read. It's tiny white text on a black background (already a bad sign) but it's also on top of Bores in a yellow shirt holding a Zapper. That's appealing.
Below the white text is yellow text describing what's in the game.
"Play as Chris Bores, Satan, Joey, and starting for the first time Ronnie" That last one sounds really awkward. Also, is it me or is the idea of playing as Satan really fucked up?
"Armed with a Zapper and a Game Genie to face the shit ahead" Did the artist not realize how stupid this sounded? If he has a Game Genie in the game, then the game is too fucking easy. I would think this was making fun of him if this wasn't so terrible.
"4 Megs of non-stop action featuring 26 levels of fuck" Each level is 5 minutes of Bores laughing at the fact you just bought this game.
The cartridge shows Mega Man sprite Bores in front of fire, and the game is just "The Irate Gamer". It also breaks the rules of NES cover art by having a cartridge that doesn't match with the box. As soon as I say this, I know my readers are going to point out games that don't have a matching cartridge label and box.

Page 4, Picture 11: ... Well, this is different. I know I've made fun of Bores' weight before, and I apologize for that, it was out of line.  There's waaaay fatter people out there. However, I didn't think I would see this picture come to be.
What we have is an overly obese Irate Gamer, with a word balloon saying "Face it, candy is ruined!" The screwed-up side of deviantArt is leaking onto the site... besides Karbia.
One thing I can give it is that shows some effort, as in someone took time to actually draw an extremely fat Irate Gamer. ... This isn't fan art is it? I think the use of "x is ruined" gave that away.

Page 4, Picture 12: Chris, what have I said about putting vomit-inducing images on the site? This is unacceptable!
More shitty sprite work, more MS paint, you need to show some standards!
The picture shows IG holding two dildos (that's what they look like, I'm sorry) firing what looks like a lime-strawberry milkshake at the Pixel Demon. Other characters are firing stuff too, including Fire Flower Mario, Simon Belmont with a flame whip, Super Sonic, Dig Dug, and Bill Rizer & Mega Man standing on the body of a brown cow. What hurts it is the background, I think it's meant to be lava.

... Here's a drinking game for you. When browsing through his fan art, take a drink every time you see a picture with a fire background, or something similar to fire.

Page 4, Picture 13: Paper Bores? It looks like paper cut-outs (even though it's not) as Bores is holding up a Shy Guy while standing in front of another one. A tribute to Super Mario Bros. 2. Not really too much to say about this one.

Page 4, Picture 14: Are you tired of Mega Man sprites? TOO BAD! Here's another one. But this time it's Haunted Investigators related. ... Someone actually made Haunted Investigators fan art. This is Johnny Awesome again isn't it? The sprite work is really bad, way worse than what Karbia does.
In fact, I'm pretty sure that's Karbia's IG sprite. The other is Alan and wow I just... I've seen enough.

I know people are asking about the next Redux Recap. It all depends on what Bores does next, and I also don't like doing too many posts at once. I did that years ago and the quality suffered. Be patient.

A New DVD for Nobody To Buy, Now With More 80s Stupidity

The end of 2012 is quickly approaching. It’s been an interesting year for Bores, his attempts at trying to get better have fallen flat in many different ways, and he continues to show that he’s a massive hypocrite that will do anything for attention. Some people are starting  to believe he’s not taking himself seriously now, but I really doubt it, especially when he’s given us one final “gift” for the year.

The I Rate the 80s DVD! Wanted by two people, you can now enjoy his terrible “documentary” attempts on your TV! See him fail at economics as he wonders why Yummy Mummy and “gimmicky” Kool-Aid flavors were pulled off shelves. Marvel at him eating 20 year old cereal and dressing up like Skeletor. Watch as he wrestles a toy Japanese wrestler and try to pass off that he has multiple Colorforms sets when he really only has one.

According to him, the DVD contains the 11 episodes of “Season 1” (for someone who’s all about American TV, he really loves his British brevity), a 10 minute documentary (where I imagine he once again pretends he’s being interviewed and try to claim that what he does is harder than it really is), bloopers, an extended scene (just one scene, singular) and more. It can be yours for $13.99. What’s that? You’d rather take that $14 dollars and invest in a failing company? I won’t stop you.

His news post about the DVD has this bit, “your in luck”. You’re 34 years old Chris, and you still can’t tell the difference between “your” and “you’re”? Jeez…

That’s not all, Bores posted a new video about it. A three and a half minute excerpt of the DVD documentary.
Since it’s not the full “documentary“, I’ll just give the big details.

As you might expect, Bores is pretending he’s being interviewed.
He mentions The Breakfast Rant, and believes the idea didn’t work as he pigeonholed himself into only reviewing breakfast. That and it was a fucking stupid idea and its only contribution was the hilarious line “breakfast is ruined!” He also says “breakfast” really weird.
He does bring up the name’s comparison to VH1’s I Love the 80s, but says his is different because it has humor and it’s a documentary. I Love the 80s had humor too, the people talking about the 80s were comedians, actors, musicians, and they were all making jokes about the subjects.

He also brings up the year-long hiatus, apparently it took him that long to think of “actually rating stuff” and “interacting with the items”. The latter he’s already been doing on his other show, so how it took him that long… fuck it.
Then he brings up that like Family Guy, he’s purposely putting in references very few people will get. Doesn’t help when most of your audience consists of little kids! Then again, the average Family Guy viewer probably wouldn’t get even the most obvious of references.
That’s the end of the preview.

Considering that nobody has uploaded the three IG seasons online to other sites, I don’t see this getting uploaded anywhere. I hope someone does do this though (not BitTorrent as NOBODY will seed it).

I also see that the IG 5th anniversary sale is still going on. He said before that once an item is gone, it’s gone. Seeing as everything can still be added to the cart, nobody is biting. I still believe this sale is him trying to get rid of it, along with all the contests.

On the front page, under “latest reviews”, he claims the latest Neo review was on Family Guy: Back to the Multiverse. That’s false advertising as it’s not a review, it’s an interview about it. Those are entirely different things. Unless he plans to review it, then there’s no reason to put it there.

Oh yeah, and he did another Skylanders video. Even made a damn playlist of it on YouTube. Expect more of these boring videos then.
On the bright side, his Hunger Games video with the fake thumbnail isn’t getting a massive amount of views. In fact, it has less than the Colorforms video and Lego Batman 2 video (all posted around the same time).

Unless he uploads something else of importance, the next post will be the Worst Moments list.