Week of April 13th: Arrows and Bats. Feels like DC Comics.

According to a comment from Bores, pretending to be his mom again, he reserves his main videos for Friday while Monday & Wednesday are “other things”. Why he couldn’t explain this in a site post or in a video is beyond my comprehension but at least we now have an idea of what he’s doing.
What does this mean for me? I don’t know, I’m still working out what to do. I guess you’ll see recaps on either Friday or Saturday, or even Thursday if one of the first two videos has a lot of crap in it.

Monday’s video is a Let’s Play of Kid Icarus. Sounds like this is a new trend to look out for. When he “reviews” something, an LP will follow.
Here are the “highlights”

- Facecam is in a different position. He’s now sitting in a chair and not on the floor. At least he improved that.
He also has a cold.

- It’s nostalgic, he loves this game. You didn’t really show that when you threw it on the ground and smashed an eggplant on it. That’s a really bizarre way of showing “love”.
“It has a learning curve” Not really… the controls are simple. All you have to “learn” is to dodge enemies, and that’s standard in almost every game. If anything, Uprising has a learning curve considering how counter-intuitive those controls are. Still waiting for a Wii U remake Nintendo.

- He claims that people misunderstood his intention with the video, believing that he hated the game, when he was just trying to show it was really hard. Chris, you can’t actually be THIS dense. You call yourself the Irate Gamer, you spend entire videos saying a game is bad, very often reaching for “flaws” that are either normal for games or issues NOBODY had with it, you go through videos without mentioning positive aspects (you didn’t mention DuckTales’ music once, how do you even do that?!), you shouldn’t be surprised that people think you hate a game. Unless you make it clear that it’s satire (like The Cinema Snob) or actually explain your real feelings in the video (like most reviewers worth a damn) then people are going to think you hate the games you talk about. How long have you been doing this? How do you still not get it?

- He mentions the Game Boy Kid Icarus game (Kid Icarus: Of Myths and Monsters) and he wants to find a way to review that. Again, you’re supposed to look at bad games. The game should come first, then the jokes. Not the jokes first.

- At one point he calls what he’s doing a review. Wow, he really doesn’t know the difference.

- He mentions a “coincidence” that happened after he reviewed the game. He reveals that the childhood friend that introduced him to the game… died. Jeez, that’s morbid. He just says it all so casually too. Moving on…

- He mentions that people asked him about Kid Icarus Uprising. He says he only played it at E3 and didn’t like it so he didn’t get it. His loss, Uprising is awesome. Even if the controls are troublesome. I think the reason is that Chris is left-handed and the game is not very kind to lefties unless they have the Circle Pad Pro (or the New 3DS XL). If you’re wondering why I think Chris is left-handed, his OLD video Back to the Past shows him writing with his left hand.

- After another death, he keeps going on about Uprising. He didn’t think it looked good, because it was a departure from what made the first game “iconic”. You’re a fool. Do you really think they wouldn’t update the game 25 years later? Even the New Super Mario Bros series is different from the old games, adding triple-jumping, wall-jumping, and completely different physics and power-ups. Along with multiplayer for the console versions. I know people like to bring up the old “Zelda is the same game since Ocarina of Time” argument, but that always brings plenty new to each iteration. Hell, Uprising actually kept a lot of elements from the first game. Hearts as currency, the death jingle, all the game’s bosses returned (including Tanatos, the snake that fought alongside Medusa. Though now he’s called Thanatos, the H stands for HAAMAZING!), many of the enemies returned, hot springs, the Three Sacred Treasures, all mixed in with a ton of new elements like various weapons, lots of new characters, and multiplayer.
He claims people told him they didn’t like it. Sounds like people that couldn’t git gud. As I said earlier, Uprising has a learning curve much like Demon’s Souls/Dark Souls/Bloodborne or The Wonderful 101.  I guess Bores just wanted to hear it sucked so he believed it sucked.
Eventually he does say he’ll check it out but not now. Prepare for bitching!

- Throughout the video, he keeps trying to avoid the Reapers instead of killing them. I don’t think he realizes they can be killed.

- After dying again, he calls this a “review” again, and says this is to show stuff he “didn’t cover”. Is that why you didn’t mention the various power-ups, the health restoring items, the hot springs, or even the music? One thing that could have been mentioned was its relationship with Metroid. Both were made by Gunpei Yokoi, both had similar password systems, one game is about going up to Heaven while the other is going down to the center of the planet, even the Komayto enemies in Skyworld resemble Metroids (which I will say despite Viridi’s objections)

- Apparently the one thing that people complained about enough for him to address was the hammers in the Boss Fortresses, and how they can free the Centurions from statues. Why didn’t he bring this up before? HE DOESN’T SAY! It was probably “it was funnier if I didn’t” but he realized he can’t say that because people gave him crap for saying that before.

At least this wasn’t as bad as the DuckTales LP. No long pauses of silence, no interrupting the flow just to find a copy of a different game, but it was still boring with idiotic moments.

Wednesday’s video is about amiibo. HOLY SHIT 27 MINUTES?! Dear god!
Going by the title, it’s about the supply issues with the upcoming Smash Bros Wave 4. Charizard, Robin, Lucina, Pac-Man, Wario, Ness, Greninja, and Jigglypuff (the last three being retail exclusives in North America). As well as the Splatoon amiibo coming out the same day.
You know, this doesn’t need a long rambling video to basically say “Nintendo needs to make more supply, and stores need to limit one per customer to cease the immense scalping. Nintendo also needs to realize that people don’t want endless Marios and Links and need to supply the stores with the “lesser” characters. They should also sell amiibo on their online store as it goes directly to them. Why should I pay $80 for Little Mac when he’s normally supposed to be $13?!”

I’ve got better things to do with my time. I’m not going to spend half an hour watching this.
Uatu did inform me that near the end of the video, he announced he opened a new site.
amiiboinformer.com.
Checking it… it’s another blog with Bores just gushing about fan art. If you’ve been following amiibo at all, there are vastly better sources you could go to. Such as myamiibonews.com or amiiboinquirer.com.
Still, GotGame let him open another site on their servers. What does he even bring? It's certainly not traffic. The last two videos he posted there didn't even get 1000 hits.

Friday’s video is… lame.
It’s another one of his “IG Shorts”, only it’s no longer called that, it’s now called “NES Sprite Fun”. That is flagrant false advertising, there is nothing “fun” here.
It’s Bores and *sighs* fucking Ronnie in Castlevania. They approach the Giant Bat (the first boss) who happens to be sleeping. Bores tries to formulate a plan, but Simon Belmont throws a Holy Water at it and wakes it up. … That’s the end. Well not entirely as the “plz subscreebe” message has him running from the Giant Bat as apparently this is somehow funny. Whole thing is only a minute.

So much for Friday being the “big video day”. Maybe the cold did it?

I imagine we’ll get whatever he planned next week.